A Real Day Off!!!

November 18, 2008

A Real Day Off!

I woke up this morning from a very blissful yesterday. I had a great work out yesterday, I did some Tantric work with a friend that was so healing for both of us. I was the giver but man oh man, you really heal on both sides, being the giver and receiver in this glorious work. It opens one up to all the issues at hand, our blocks, fears and has us go in deeper, dive in, feel, sense, eyes open….fully awake, incredibly conscious we grow, let go and go through our stuff. It is so magical to be doing such deep work, so consciously. I can’t tell you how fulfilling it is to be touched consciously, to touch consciously.

It doesn’t matter if it’s sexual or arousing, non arousing…it’s the fact that you can feel love coming into your body, or going out into another’s body. That bring a certain centered, energy rising, relaxed feeling within. It is so comforting to the soul to know that the one who is touching is touching out of love, not need, not wondering about the next step or if we are going have sex…..as it’s all healing….there is no sex, there is no next step, it’s conscious loving touch, it’s raising the energy and letting it expand and open and then spreading it through the body and then raising, relaxing all over again. It’s expansion like I’ve never known and all in safe hands of a friend, not a lover, just a loving friend.

So after this Tantric afternoon I went to a friends place to dance amongst friends. Through opening to give this work earlier it opened me to really give and receive energy in the dance and Pow, Boom, Bang!!!! Passion, love, heart opening experiences happened. The fear of “what if….this or what if that” left the building, my energy was open, everyone felt it and thank goodness it was contagious and we all just took off in sensual delight of a dance. I raised my friends into the air, I taught the dance I love so much through flying them into the air, having them laugh, melt and fall in love with the dance even more. Honestly it just cracks me up to lift someone and have them immediately laugh, look at me and the feeling that pours from them is love, love of the dance, love for being there and the love for the dancer holding them, that would be me-it’s powerful. One guy that showed up that night, new to energy got so opened, he was vibrating for some days afterward, very powerful stuff and so healing.

Since it was my friends birthday and after a lovely delicious and intimate night of dance we all gave him a clothed massage until I broke out the ice cream…..we used him as beautiful tray and ate the ice cream off his back….well at least the women did, the men weren’t too into that with another man. He laughed with joyous bliss and we closed in a very intimate hug of the group.

This morning, after 8 hours of sleep, waking up at 9am, I curled up, snuggled and cuddled with Sukhi, she purred and just drank it in. Then I was up to check emails, get some breakfast going, just being in the moment. It was lovely. I decided to give Sukhi her first bath for no reason but to get her used to the water. I went into the tub with her. I put her down into the tub and she turned in fright and hung on to me, no claws-amazing how she can do that. She was so scared…I just held her, let her move, let her cling to me and then when she realized I was there, she wasn’t going to drown she relaxed and sat there with me. She allowed me to put water on her as she looked up at me checking in with me. I think making sure she was ok. I feel since I was in there with her she felt safer. It was a bonding moment for us. I grabbed her towel, wrapped her up in it and took her into the living room, rocking her like a baby, drying her slowly as she gazed up at me knowing she was ok and feeling safe in my arms.

After putting her down I walked into the other room, I sat down and picked up one of my Tantra books to read more on the subject. Reading about women and Tantra, and how important having our own practice is and how our bodies respond to stimulation, orgasm, sex and pregnancy. It was so powerful to read about. It got me very centered, very here and now. It woke something up in me even more powerful then it was just yesterday, a centeredness, an awakening to do the practice and go to share the energy with others.

As the day moved on, I drove down to the beach and took a walk. The beach beckoned me like a moth craving that flame. I needed to be outside, I needed the fresh air, the sound of the sea and the sand beneath my feet. As I walked something told me to stop, stop here. So I did. I lay down on my sarong and went into this deep place of the now. My mind of course left and came back but honestly there wasn’t a whole lot of attachment to the thoughts, the thoughts just passed. So gorgeous to just feel my body on the sand, to be present, to feel my body pressing into the sand, the perfect temperature of the sun radiating on my body, the breeze was just at the right speed for comfort and presence.

I stayed there for I’m not sure how long….all I do know is two things, one is I usually get off the beaching saying “I have to do this or that” pushing myself to leave, but today there wasn’t that, I was just in bliss for having this glorious time there, I felt very full and not rushed. As I stood and walked to my car I felt, now this is a day off. No plans, no where to be, just being present, reading, writing, being in nature….opening, seeing the thoughts, feeling my feelings and moving forward. I learned so much in the time of relaxation, no stressful thoughts-well one, when this man yelled at me on the road, but oh well….: ) I moved on. I got back to my car and the second thing I noticed was that I’d been out there for 2 ½ hours, WOW, how lovely. Then it really felt like a real day off.

Last week I went with a girlfriend to Deep Creek. This is a magical place the people drive 2- 2 ½ hours to hike down to this river about 45 minutes to let go of the city. You strip off. No need for clothes there, there were a few locals there as it wasn’t the weekend. And we all sat in the numerous natural hot springs, then dip in the ice cold river and back to the hot springs. Laying on the earth was just lovely, feeling the warmth, the cold, all of it was so lovely. It was a hard decision at first to go, I felt like I was playing hooky from school, which I didn’t even do in school…but I had no clients that day and said “what the heck” and went for it. I’m glad I did. I came back to dance with friends until midnight and then passed out.

That relaxed feeling from the hot springs stayed with me through out the next day.
I see everyone around me, including myself going through so much lately, so much is being worked through. I think it’s partly the holidays coming up, the new year coming up pressing on them that another year is here and the reality that dreams want to come out of all of us and they want to be looked at, felt and manifested. I can feel them all happening.

I know for me I am being requested more and more every week to teach dance so I feel I’m weeks away from that, maybe sooner. I teach it to people anyway, so why not have a class with it. How fun! We might as well enjoy what we do for work, it allows more success into our lives and passion for others to see, feel and grow from.

I’ve been thinking about success and what it takes to be a successful person. And what I have really gotten is not that they have made a lot of money, the dollar amount doesn’t make someone successful. It’s the amount of joy and happiness they get from their work and the allowance of love all around them. This is what makes one successful. So if we can just remember to do what we love, what we are passionate about we will grow in success, as people will see you love it and they will come to you. We’ve all seen the opposite, why not choose the other way, it really is the easier path, for the heart and soul that is and sometimes even for the body.

That night, last Tuesday I received another Tantric Healing session and it was powerful, the tears, the tenderness, the passion, the ecstaticness, sadness and so much that came up to be seen, felt, embraced, breathed through and to be held in the light of love no matter what. Such beautiful, healing work. I am grateful for this time, for this work and for the power to grow.

May you be healing, may you find success in all areas of your life and may you be surrounded by love always.
Love and blessings, Heather