Hello there,
Yes, I know it's been a while. I guess life has just taken me away. But you are never far from my thoughts. So I guess the last time I wrote was when I left Kerala. So let me back up to Mysore. Mysore was this great city that had an amazing Palace that they lit up with thousands of lights on Sunday nights.It was magical, breath taking, stunning and like a fairy tale castle at night. By day, well let me just say this, taking a walk around this place, I thought "Oh this will take an hour" well the glass ceilings, edges of the walls and ceiling that were painted with angels, birds, peacocks and designs just left me thrilled and after 3 hours of stairing upward toward the painted ceilings and the colored glass I was blown away and pooped! My chiropractor is going to love me-literally, as he tells me looking up is a good thing for the neck as we spend so much time looking down it screws up the spine.
But anyway, I met Christine, which I think I told you about and she made sure I did some touristy things, like going to ruins, temples, etc. Not my thing really but honestly after taking over 300 photos of all the tiny intricate details of these relics of shiva, shakti, and many other Gods and Goddesses, I was done with being a "tourist". We ran around a few cities, missed our last bus out and had to go to another city to get another bus to the city we needed,which is the same city we forgot to get off at early that day-I suggested we jump off the train as it had just started moving but she wasn't all that keen on it and if you knew how heavy my bag was you may not have jumped either-I'll be sending some of those 14 books and new clothes home soon!
But we got to the city we needed, had an incredible dinner for something like a dollar or two and then sat at the train station-almost took a "retiring room" which is a room with a bed in it. But instead I took my comfy yoga mat, threw it down on a bench, put my head in Christine's lap and rested. There was no sleep with all the loud speaker things being screached across the train station. So our train got in only a half hour late at something like 2:30am and we were off to Hampi.
Hampi, OH, Hampi. A town I LOVE. Did I say LOVE, yes LOVE. I felt at home there, I felt at peace there. It was lovely, no traffic, no horns,no cars to dodge. Just venders trying to sell you things but other than that peace, beauty and fresh air.
Sitting next to the river in the morning after my yoga practice I'd watch the locals come and bath in their shorts for men and full on saris for women. Then they'd do laundry by smacking the clothes against rocks and concrete of the steps. Then once a sari was washed they'd go and lift it up to dry some in the wind,just blowning in their arms. Then they'd lay it down on the concrete railings to dry in the sun. So colors were every where!
The little kids would run around naked brushing their teeth with their grand father trying to get them to bathe in the river. They'd finally get there. It was stunning.
Then there were the huge banana fields amongst all the brown desert with green bushes growing amongst all the dryness! There were a ton of ruins there, I spent a whole day by foot exploring and it was just glorious to be out on foot for the whole day, with the sky threatening to rain. But just before it was to rain a rickshaw driver with already 3 people in it stopped and did the most incredible thing. He told me to get in, he was going to Hampi. I asked "for free" he told me to get in, knowing I was going to get drenched and didn't charge me a thing. I was grateful! The kindness of these people at the perfect time just opens me, reminds me to trust and to really just be and I am fully taken care of in so many ways. How have you been taken care of this week? It's nice to look at and appreciate those moments. I've had many on this trip and I lay in gratitude for these people!
So I went shopping for gorgeous clothes in Hampi, first time I felt like shopping. I think it's because it had the Rajastan feel and they have the most incredible clothes there! So it was nice.
I left there as I wanted to see Christine one more time before she left Pune and this is where I have spent my time the past days. But first I have to tell you about the woman I met on the train. Her name is Chandra, from India and she shared some lovely stories of Yoga with me, she shared food with me and she shared about her family. She gave suggestions on where to study yoga and she was my "mother" while I was on that train, making sure I was safe and sound. She knew I had to get off the train at 2am and she made sure she was awake to make sure I got off the train and that she kept her eye on me until I was off the train. I felt her heart, she was beautiful and I was such in gratitude to meet her and share such special hours with her.
I got to Pune a week and a half ago to see Christine, I stayed at a friends house here in Pune and met up with Christine. We walked around what used to be a sweet,fairly quiet Koregeon Park where Osho's now Resort is. Well nothing quiet outside the gates of Osho's,it's crazy with cars and people now. I thought to not go in but would think about it.
Well I got sick again with a fever. Thankfully Christine's friends who are all part of an organization to take in homeless women and to give them shelter and train them in something where they can work and be empowered as self suffient women. Luckily they were there. Long story short I was in the so called "hospital", with 6 beds on a drip for my dysentary and they finally were able to tell me what I had-it's the same thing as last month. Some bacteria got in my blood and they call it a blood infection. Well what ever it was it's dead now. As much as I told them "no anti biotics" wellI got them anyway,they snuck them in when I slept, when I'd go to the toilet they'd put them in my drip. I'd tell them to change my drip bag but they'd still do it later. Well after two days I was all well, walked out with the bill of $36.00 for 2 days in the hospital! It was a fun experience and I'm grateful that bug is killed now!
I'm now at Osho's, yes I changed my mind and happy I did. Though my first day was intense starting at 5:30am and going to Dynamic Meditation at 6am, having a full on day of meditation, walking around, eating and meeting a new friend or two along the way and a few old ones! Did the Aum meditation that night and went to bed finally at 4am. Yes I was up a long time. a very long time. And if you don't know much about Osho's work, most all his meditations are active, sweaty and aerobic and full of dance. Well for someone who hasn't danced since Sivanda and never for hours out of a day you can say I was pooped! So I took my maroon robe off, washed it, hung it up to dry and rested the whole next day! Shew!!!!!
Now I'm used to the program. My lungs have been stretched, my heart has been worked, my calves are getting used to all the jumping around in the meditations and so I'm getting in shape as well as I can now hold my arms up for the full 10 minutes of the Who, who, who in Dynamic meditation! Very exciting! I think that first day I dripped out about 4 liters of water including the Aum meditation. It was intense and cathartic and grilling but very much worth it!
Being here I miss my lil' sis, Renee,who was here with me the last time. She and I traveled 3 months together in India and we shared a space for that whole time and now at Osho's the memories flood me-I miss you Renee. Now she's in San Francisco with husband and baby,taking care of life! And then there are a whole mess of other people I reflect on here that I made such deep connections with and just smile in gratitude. You know who you are, I miss you too!
So I'm enjoying my time here, yet it's not the same, not as warm hearted, not as connected. It's low season so very few people and the energy of the people is less connected but the meditative energy of the resort is still beautiful, fulfilling and grounding. I'm happy about that. I feel my mind focusing, finding and feeling stillness. It's having me crave Vipassana again- as they do a one hour vipassana each day! Nice memories. So I'll be here a few more days, but since there is a missing link some where in this space I feel I'll be leaving soon,possibly see my friends at the center- the friends that fed me at the hospital,made sure I didn't leave their place until I was fully well and made sure I was comfortable and fed.
These women took me out to their villages-I don't have the website now but I'll get it to you, they do fabulous work for these women in these villages. They have 3 or 4 villages, some for children, some for older people, some for not mentally functional and they take care of them all. These people were all so full of love, so giving, so generous and all heart. I got to see even deeper the true India here with these lovely people. No one wanted anything from me,just to say hello, offer food and show us their creativities and work. It was really mind blowing and heart opening to be with and near them. The real India behind the tourist areas.
So I can go on and on, but honestly I'm sure this is enough. I'm sure there is so much I've forgotten to tell you. But how can I put them in words and I don't have the 36 hours to sit here and write to you all that I have to share.
Know that I miss you,I love you and wish you a peaceful heart, loving friends and family all around you and plenty of laughter (I did a laughing meditation-wow, intense, hard at first but after a while it came out. So incredible! One hour of laughing, or a little less actually).
I'd so love to hear from you. Remember what Osho's says, which I'm trying to implement- speak from your heart. I love that line!
Much love and many hugs to you, Heather
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Do you have buttons to be pushed? India will push them!!!
Do you have buttons to be pushed? India will push them!!!
Hello there,
Where to start that is the question with this entry. So much has happened, so much has been seen, tasted, heard, felt, done and smelt! I guess I'll start with I left Varkala as well as Kerala. I didn't realize how ready I was to leave until I did. I did love my stay there being near the ocean always makes me so happy. And my last few days there were great! I met this beautiful couple from China and we had meals together and went for a long walk as I wanted to show them the only sand beach in the area and I wanted to check out Showcut's Guesthouse that my friend Suzanne recommended to me.
Well we had a great taste of India on this adventure as we met this Indian family that took us into their home, up tiny streets to find their home with the sounds of the Muslim temples sounding their calls from here and there! We get to their home to a dirt floor, plain beds with a simple mattress on them, we sat on matts on the floor as when one of my friends sat in the only chair it broke!!! That's India! They probably only use it for guest actually. Well they insisted on feeding us traditional Indian food from their kitchen-spicy but beautiful! They were oh so generous with the food, then the chai, the water, the tea. We were well watered down and full!
After much talk about how the families daughter could go to school in Finland, where my friends live, as they have connections all was set and then them trying to see if I could get her into school or a job in the US and then to leave after a few hours.
We walked the walk to the beach which was stunning. We looked for the Showcut's with no luck, but I know we got close. But it was gorgeous with the white sand, the fisherman and clear skies with the sun going down. We found some fisherman with a few fish and one was huge, one was medium size and both fish cost us fresh, still alive on the beach in a whole in the sand, 60rs- $1.50 for both!!!! We walked home and got there just as it got dark and Illy, the wife fixed a fabulous and yummy dinner of fish and veggies, Chinese fish soup with a Indian flare of taste, with rice! That was a great way to say good bye to Varkala.
The train trip up was 17 1/2 hours long and proved again to me how hospitable Indians are. They made sure I was included in the talk, made sure my order was in when I got hungry and so I got food on the train. Finally at night when I was tired and I was on the bottom bunk the middle person above me put up his bed and went to bed! On top of all this I met this beautiful angel-all my Indian angels in this country are remarkable, his name Sundeep. He took me to the ticket office and found that the train wasn't for 7 hours to Mysore and so he walked me out and he found my bus for me and not only walked me to it but then he waited outside my window, full attention on me and when I turned after I was settled I saw these bright eyes waiting to make sure I was ok and he waved with a brilliant very white teeth smile. What an angel.
The three hour bus ride was like a roller coaster ride of things to see-so much to see in one view. After leaving the train journey where I saw women walking her 2 cows on the railroad-beef tonight if a train came, and the cows on the road, as we passed all the green lush coconut lands of Kerala. On to Karnatika, where it's less green but still beautiful. So my bus ride was wild in the way that I saw the raw, real India again for the first time since Calcutta, but this time there are cows in the streets, boys having a rope on a cow walking it, a telephone in the middle of no where, except a hut next to it, the phone balanced on a wooden pole with an umbrella above it to shield the sun if someone wanted to use the yellow device! Where is my camera when I need it!
Then we passed the boy on the bike with colorful buckets, bowls, balls, all kinds of plastic objects strapped onto his bike about 3 feet wide and high riding down the street, another one on a motorbike. Then there was the woman with a green bale of hay so high on her head and wide you couldn't see her face, walking down the freeway. Then there are these huge animals, I haven't found out what they are yet, maybe white water buffalo, that have horns and they have a carrage full of things with a man on board and a wooden slat behind their heads to keep their heads up as they bobble in awkward rythems down the street pulling this cart. It looked so unnatural as their heads normally lean forward and their gate was too quick for them and so their heads looked strange as their heads were all over the place.
So I get into Mysore, jump off the bus that is way to high off the ground for me and my bag. It's the only place I got into that only one Richshaw person asked me for a ride. I walked to my hotel, where only locals stay with a dingy restaurant and bar. Got my room with my own bath. Ok, get this, it's call the Green's Hotel. My walls are green, I have two twin beds with canapies with nothing on them, I have a bathroom that probably hasn't been cleaned in a while. It has windows to the hallway as well as one at the ceiling light to come in when the electricy goes out, which it does often here. My sheets were used from the last person that was here, my blanket probably hasn't been washed since it was bought. But it is home to me!!!! I love my little dingy room with a desk with attached mirror! Yes, it's mine and for 90rs ($2.12) who can complain! Cheapest place in town!
Ok, so I leave my place and within a 1/2 hour I get 2 phone numbers from people who want to "be friends" and show me around and tell me about a oil and incense festival going on only today! Within a day I had 4 phone numbers. Oh and 4 people asked me in the first half hour if I was here for yoga and then I remembered this is Ashtanga Yoga town.
I finally ate and came out to walk and this same boy found me and walked me to this so called festival. Well this festival is a private bottom floor of a house where this Ayurvedic "doctor" has incense made by 5 women and he tries to sell the essential oils for US prices as it is pure. This is the thing for Mysore, incense and oils and silks.
Well everyone here has a factory to show you, wants to be friends and show you around, "no money, just friends". The bustling of the streets is wild. I haven't walked around a city in over 2 months. Now I have to dodge not only rickshaws, people, and cars, but now cows with great big horns and huge utters full of milk. Hummm.....do females have horns in the US? Probably! Still more healthy dogs here with utters as well from their pups! I never remember dogs having such long, saggy boobies!!! ; )
Oh, I forgot I was considering staying in Varkala as my landlord wanted me to do hair and teach yoga there. He knew of a two bedroom/2 bathroom apartment with a full sundeck for only $375.00 A YEAR!!!! Yep you heard me right. But I left.
I saw a sign the other day that said "Muslim Burial Ground under construction", no thank you, don't want to be there! Another sign in my favorite restaurant so far that says "you can smoke as long as you don't exhale"-Love it!!! Then I took a bus to Chumundi Hill and saw lots of signs saying "you are entering a no plastic zone", well with India there is no such thing as no plastic. Everything is either plastic or they cook everything in Aluminum-not good! Both of health effects. But when told about it they say that steele is worse-not sure where they got that.
For my breakfast I go 2 doors down to the Veg-Kourt for a buffet of my first cornflakes in years, fresh cut papaya, Uppa-and Indian dish that is spelled and said a million different ways- it's semolina with veggies-my favorite breakfast here, with Chai, all for 45rs (40rs=$1.00). Then for lunch I go to my favorite place to eat that serves the northern Indian version of a Thali, here called "meals". This is a huge chapti (indian tortilla), a large bowl of rice, 2 veggies, two liquid veggy dishes, butter milk in a little bowl and curd-top that off with a sweet lassi (a sweet yogurt drink!) all for the price of meal 17rs and lassi 12rs or 10rs depending on what day you are there, it's lunch, it's delicious and it's all you can eat! But I don't need all you can eat as it's plenty as is!
Oh, on the trains here and buses, it's really hard for me to deal with, with a country so big, populated and traveled they throw plastics, paper, everything out the windows. It's so sad. When asked about it they say, and this is so true, that there are no bins on the trains, I couldn't find one so they don't have options of a trash can or recycling yet. I hope soon though. Some say that garbage is the least of their problems, but one day they'll need to do something about it. I hope!
I saw a woman reach down dip her bowl into the gutter water on the street of Bangalore and wash her face from it, well that's one way to wash your face, but is it more clean before or afterward! ; )
I love this country for it's differences but then it pushes my buttons as well, like many other people that come here. Being a white or western person here we are constantly questioned and it's the same questions "what is your good name? Where are you from? Do you like Mysore or where ever? How long you here? Where you going?" etc. There are more but those are just the most common. They are always trying to get something from us. I can't understand or put myself in their shoes walking up to someone, if I was wearing nice clothes and clean, and say "give me money or pen please, coins please". I wish I could understand it but it's such a different culture from the US.
How can I put myself in their shoes with my mind and see that it is ok to ask for something from someone just because they have a different skin color-this is my dilemna. I can understand being hungry and needing food, but most of these people have food, a bed at night, a family that loves them and clean nice clothes. But my lesson is love and patience in all of this and to stay open. As when I close it only gets worse.
In Bangalore I saw people riding one humped camels in the streets! I've only seen this in Rajastan last time.
I have to say I'm more at ease with the dirt and grime of the real India here in Mysore then the beautiful, sort of poshness of Kerala. It's like some part of me loves the realness, everything hanging out dirt of the third world, though it pushes my buttons with the sharp loud shreaks of the horns on the cars, the screaming in the streets, the non stop harassment, the women being closed off to everyone and a look of sadness in their face, the non stop dodging someone or something as they won't get out of your way. This if funny, in a country with so many people you'd think they would know how to walk around each other-this cracks me up, but they walk right toward you and they do it to other Indians too, not just westerners. It's as if they are unaware that they are going to run into you or maybe they think you'll move. But it really challenges me some days and somedays I just laugh. Always an adventure! ; )
Did I tell you the wetness of Kerala? I hung my bag up and while I was in Varkala it grew about a 1/2 inch thick mold through it's suede from the outside to the inside, this was the wetness of that state. Right now here and now, is the first time my skin has been dry since January 25th, the day I left. I haven't been dry since then until now. It actually gets cool out, I need a long sleeved top, I need a blanket at night and I can wear my khakis without sweating to death in them! I love the elevation and dryness of the almost desert!
I hiked up the Chumundi Hill- it's a 1000 steps up and a 1000 steps back down. Yes some great aerobic exercise!!!! Loved it. Yet I stopped and talked to many Indians and a few westerners (most I've seen since Sivananda) along the way, played with the Indian babies with their black smudges on their foreheads -this is to make their baby ugly so no one comes and takes their babies, but the beauty of them shines through anyway. They don't have any clue how to deal with a white person so I just tickle them and make them laugh and then they almost forget I'm white as for their belly laughter!
Oh I walked through their market with a color show of powdered brightly colored paints for skin, piled up in high in bowls-reds, yellows, oranges, greens, all for dying or painting. Then you follow a woman to a stall and she has the flowers Jasmine in her hair as most Indian women do, then the scent of Lotus coming from my skin from the oil seller down the way, then comes the most lovely scent that I haven't smelled in 7 months of cilantro from the veggie market. The bright colors of carrots, greens, avocados, then the cut open pomogranites that are face up to be shown to sell. Gorgeous! So many scents and colors to feast your eyes on it's the most brilliant place to be for the senses!
On the train up here and in other places Indians ask how I can travel alone, they'd be scared, aren't I scared? I didn't realize it but Indians don't do anything alone and people don't travel alone unless they have to for business. Even if on a business trip they'll take a friend with them. So am I scared, at times, it's the unknown, but for the most part I just take in the view and everyday is a lesson in trusting and everyday I am shown that I can. Even if it's just a little bit.
Like this morning,I go the lesson I'm being taken care of. I need to have a hot bucket shower twice a week for my Siddha oil bath and so I asked for hot water (not normal for here to have hot water for bathing), they boil my water and before I can get it they have come with it to my door. They make sure I am carrying the bucket correctly not to burn myself or spill it on myself and then I go in and feel this overwhelming feeling of being taken care of and trust in the Universe.
So strange to have days where I want to go home or I want to just go off to Australia and then I have something like the hot water happen and I am just pleased as pie! I grin, I feel great, I am in love with life and happy to be here and alive.
Today I was invited to the next village over where the yoga is to have lunch with some girls from Canada and the US, it was great to have the company of Westerners, have a salad, YES! and for the first time since I was probably 10 a grilled cheese sandwich in their very westernized apartment they sublet for 5000rs a month, but goes for 10,000rs normally-tv, couch, kitchen, hot water and everything is there.
I have met a lovely Austrian woman as well that we had dinner together last night and now we are going to dinner again, it's nice to have company for some meals. Today has been great, I had the best meditation I've had in months, so focused and clear. I had great company, I found an Ayurvedic Hospital that I want to check out and now I'm off to dinner.
Life is good, even with all my buttons being pushed, it's really beautiful. But if we don't have our buttons pushed we don't know they are there and how do we learn and grow. So look and listen for those buttons as they are our guidelines to where we need to grow. My patience and love is growing each day, my mind is calming (I think the Siddha medicine is working-something in having to care for yourself with oil twice a week and medication 3 times a day does something to the self caring) and so life is looking so beautiful.
I got a huge awakening yesterday that I want to find a new yoga community and go deeper into yoga and the practice and the living of yoga. I'm so excited by this, ever so thrilled. I feel this is a beautiful way to heal and grow and expand the mind and let go of the chatter. So I am researching yoga all over India, it's exciting yet so far everything starts in September and October, I'm sure it will work itself out!
Live your dreams, let your heart fly, speak your passions and dream your dreams that you dare to have come true and they will! I send you love, light, hugs and smiles. Many blessings and sweet dreams, Love, Heather
Hello there,
Where to start that is the question with this entry. So much has happened, so much has been seen, tasted, heard, felt, done and smelt! I guess I'll start with I left Varkala as well as Kerala. I didn't realize how ready I was to leave until I did. I did love my stay there being near the ocean always makes me so happy. And my last few days there were great! I met this beautiful couple from China and we had meals together and went for a long walk as I wanted to show them the only sand beach in the area and I wanted to check out Showcut's Guesthouse that my friend Suzanne recommended to me.
Well we had a great taste of India on this adventure as we met this Indian family that took us into their home, up tiny streets to find their home with the sounds of the Muslim temples sounding their calls from here and there! We get to their home to a dirt floor, plain beds with a simple mattress on them, we sat on matts on the floor as when one of my friends sat in the only chair it broke!!! That's India! They probably only use it for guest actually. Well they insisted on feeding us traditional Indian food from their kitchen-spicy but beautiful! They were oh so generous with the food, then the chai, the water, the tea. We were well watered down and full!
After much talk about how the families daughter could go to school in Finland, where my friends live, as they have connections all was set and then them trying to see if I could get her into school or a job in the US and then to leave after a few hours.
We walked the walk to the beach which was stunning. We looked for the Showcut's with no luck, but I know we got close. But it was gorgeous with the white sand, the fisherman and clear skies with the sun going down. We found some fisherman with a few fish and one was huge, one was medium size and both fish cost us fresh, still alive on the beach in a whole in the sand, 60rs- $1.50 for both!!!! We walked home and got there just as it got dark and Illy, the wife fixed a fabulous and yummy dinner of fish and veggies, Chinese fish soup with a Indian flare of taste, with rice! That was a great way to say good bye to Varkala.
The train trip up was 17 1/2 hours long and proved again to me how hospitable Indians are. They made sure I was included in the talk, made sure my order was in when I got hungry and so I got food on the train. Finally at night when I was tired and I was on the bottom bunk the middle person above me put up his bed and went to bed! On top of all this I met this beautiful angel-all my Indian angels in this country are remarkable, his name Sundeep. He took me to the ticket office and found that the train wasn't for 7 hours to Mysore and so he walked me out and he found my bus for me and not only walked me to it but then he waited outside my window, full attention on me and when I turned after I was settled I saw these bright eyes waiting to make sure I was ok and he waved with a brilliant very white teeth smile. What an angel.
The three hour bus ride was like a roller coaster ride of things to see-so much to see in one view. After leaving the train journey where I saw women walking her 2 cows on the railroad-beef tonight if a train came, and the cows on the road, as we passed all the green lush coconut lands of Kerala. On to Karnatika, where it's less green but still beautiful. So my bus ride was wild in the way that I saw the raw, real India again for the first time since Calcutta, but this time there are cows in the streets, boys having a rope on a cow walking it, a telephone in the middle of no where, except a hut next to it, the phone balanced on a wooden pole with an umbrella above it to shield the sun if someone wanted to use the yellow device! Where is my camera when I need it!
Then we passed the boy on the bike with colorful buckets, bowls, balls, all kinds of plastic objects strapped onto his bike about 3 feet wide and high riding down the street, another one on a motorbike. Then there was the woman with a green bale of hay so high on her head and wide you couldn't see her face, walking down the freeway. Then there are these huge animals, I haven't found out what they are yet, maybe white water buffalo, that have horns and they have a carrage full of things with a man on board and a wooden slat behind their heads to keep their heads up as they bobble in awkward rythems down the street pulling this cart. It looked so unnatural as their heads normally lean forward and their gate was too quick for them and so their heads looked strange as their heads were all over the place.
So I get into Mysore, jump off the bus that is way to high off the ground for me and my bag. It's the only place I got into that only one Richshaw person asked me for a ride. I walked to my hotel, where only locals stay with a dingy restaurant and bar. Got my room with my own bath. Ok, get this, it's call the Green's Hotel. My walls are green, I have two twin beds with canapies with nothing on them, I have a bathroom that probably hasn't been cleaned in a while. It has windows to the hallway as well as one at the ceiling light to come in when the electricy goes out, which it does often here. My sheets were used from the last person that was here, my blanket probably hasn't been washed since it was bought. But it is home to me!!!! I love my little dingy room with a desk with attached mirror! Yes, it's mine and for 90rs ($2.12) who can complain! Cheapest place in town!
Ok, so I leave my place and within a 1/2 hour I get 2 phone numbers from people who want to "be friends" and show me around and tell me about a oil and incense festival going on only today! Within a day I had 4 phone numbers. Oh and 4 people asked me in the first half hour if I was here for yoga and then I remembered this is Ashtanga Yoga town.
I finally ate and came out to walk and this same boy found me and walked me to this so called festival. Well this festival is a private bottom floor of a house where this Ayurvedic "doctor" has incense made by 5 women and he tries to sell the essential oils for US prices as it is pure. This is the thing for Mysore, incense and oils and silks.
Well everyone here has a factory to show you, wants to be friends and show you around, "no money, just friends". The bustling of the streets is wild. I haven't walked around a city in over 2 months. Now I have to dodge not only rickshaws, people, and cars, but now cows with great big horns and huge utters full of milk. Hummm.....do females have horns in the US? Probably! Still more healthy dogs here with utters as well from their pups! I never remember dogs having such long, saggy boobies!!! ; )
Oh, I forgot I was considering staying in Varkala as my landlord wanted me to do hair and teach yoga there. He knew of a two bedroom/2 bathroom apartment with a full sundeck for only $375.00 A YEAR!!!! Yep you heard me right. But I left.
I saw a sign the other day that said "Muslim Burial Ground under construction", no thank you, don't want to be there! Another sign in my favorite restaurant so far that says "you can smoke as long as you don't exhale"-Love it!!! Then I took a bus to Chumundi Hill and saw lots of signs saying "you are entering a no plastic zone", well with India there is no such thing as no plastic. Everything is either plastic or they cook everything in Aluminum-not good! Both of health effects. But when told about it they say that steele is worse-not sure where they got that.
For my breakfast I go 2 doors down to the Veg-Kourt for a buffet of my first cornflakes in years, fresh cut papaya, Uppa-and Indian dish that is spelled and said a million different ways- it's semolina with veggies-my favorite breakfast here, with Chai, all for 45rs (40rs=$1.00). Then for lunch I go to my favorite place to eat that serves the northern Indian version of a Thali, here called "meals". This is a huge chapti (indian tortilla), a large bowl of rice, 2 veggies, two liquid veggy dishes, butter milk in a little bowl and curd-top that off with a sweet lassi (a sweet yogurt drink!) all for the price of meal 17rs and lassi 12rs or 10rs depending on what day you are there, it's lunch, it's delicious and it's all you can eat! But I don't need all you can eat as it's plenty as is!
Oh, on the trains here and buses, it's really hard for me to deal with, with a country so big, populated and traveled they throw plastics, paper, everything out the windows. It's so sad. When asked about it they say, and this is so true, that there are no bins on the trains, I couldn't find one so they don't have options of a trash can or recycling yet. I hope soon though. Some say that garbage is the least of their problems, but one day they'll need to do something about it. I hope!
I saw a woman reach down dip her bowl into the gutter water on the street of Bangalore and wash her face from it, well that's one way to wash your face, but is it more clean before or afterward! ; )
I love this country for it's differences but then it pushes my buttons as well, like many other people that come here. Being a white or western person here we are constantly questioned and it's the same questions "what is your good name? Where are you from? Do you like Mysore or where ever? How long you here? Where you going?" etc. There are more but those are just the most common. They are always trying to get something from us. I can't understand or put myself in their shoes walking up to someone, if I was wearing nice clothes and clean, and say "give me money or pen please, coins please". I wish I could understand it but it's such a different culture from the US.
How can I put myself in their shoes with my mind and see that it is ok to ask for something from someone just because they have a different skin color-this is my dilemna. I can understand being hungry and needing food, but most of these people have food, a bed at night, a family that loves them and clean nice clothes. But my lesson is love and patience in all of this and to stay open. As when I close it only gets worse.
In Bangalore I saw people riding one humped camels in the streets! I've only seen this in Rajastan last time.
I have to say I'm more at ease with the dirt and grime of the real India here in Mysore then the beautiful, sort of poshness of Kerala. It's like some part of me loves the realness, everything hanging out dirt of the third world, though it pushes my buttons with the sharp loud shreaks of the horns on the cars, the screaming in the streets, the non stop harassment, the women being closed off to everyone and a look of sadness in their face, the non stop dodging someone or something as they won't get out of your way. This if funny, in a country with so many people you'd think they would know how to walk around each other-this cracks me up, but they walk right toward you and they do it to other Indians too, not just westerners. It's as if they are unaware that they are going to run into you or maybe they think you'll move. But it really challenges me some days and somedays I just laugh. Always an adventure! ; )
Did I tell you the wetness of Kerala? I hung my bag up and while I was in Varkala it grew about a 1/2 inch thick mold through it's suede from the outside to the inside, this was the wetness of that state. Right now here and now, is the first time my skin has been dry since January 25th, the day I left. I haven't been dry since then until now. It actually gets cool out, I need a long sleeved top, I need a blanket at night and I can wear my khakis without sweating to death in them! I love the elevation and dryness of the almost desert!
I hiked up the Chumundi Hill- it's a 1000 steps up and a 1000 steps back down. Yes some great aerobic exercise!!!! Loved it. Yet I stopped and talked to many Indians and a few westerners (most I've seen since Sivananda) along the way, played with the Indian babies with their black smudges on their foreheads -this is to make their baby ugly so no one comes and takes their babies, but the beauty of them shines through anyway. They don't have any clue how to deal with a white person so I just tickle them and make them laugh and then they almost forget I'm white as for their belly laughter!
Oh I walked through their market with a color show of powdered brightly colored paints for skin, piled up in high in bowls-reds, yellows, oranges, greens, all for dying or painting. Then you follow a woman to a stall and she has the flowers Jasmine in her hair as most Indian women do, then the scent of Lotus coming from my skin from the oil seller down the way, then comes the most lovely scent that I haven't smelled in 7 months of cilantro from the veggie market. The bright colors of carrots, greens, avocados, then the cut open pomogranites that are face up to be shown to sell. Gorgeous! So many scents and colors to feast your eyes on it's the most brilliant place to be for the senses!
On the train up here and in other places Indians ask how I can travel alone, they'd be scared, aren't I scared? I didn't realize it but Indians don't do anything alone and people don't travel alone unless they have to for business. Even if on a business trip they'll take a friend with them. So am I scared, at times, it's the unknown, but for the most part I just take in the view and everyday is a lesson in trusting and everyday I am shown that I can. Even if it's just a little bit.
Like this morning,I go the lesson I'm being taken care of. I need to have a hot bucket shower twice a week for my Siddha oil bath and so I asked for hot water (not normal for here to have hot water for bathing), they boil my water and before I can get it they have come with it to my door. They make sure I am carrying the bucket correctly not to burn myself or spill it on myself and then I go in and feel this overwhelming feeling of being taken care of and trust in the Universe.
So strange to have days where I want to go home or I want to just go off to Australia and then I have something like the hot water happen and I am just pleased as pie! I grin, I feel great, I am in love with life and happy to be here and alive.
Today I was invited to the next village over where the yoga is to have lunch with some girls from Canada and the US, it was great to have the company of Westerners, have a salad, YES! and for the first time since I was probably 10 a grilled cheese sandwich in their very westernized apartment they sublet for 5000rs a month, but goes for 10,000rs normally-tv, couch, kitchen, hot water and everything is there.
I have met a lovely Austrian woman as well that we had dinner together last night and now we are going to dinner again, it's nice to have company for some meals. Today has been great, I had the best meditation I've had in months, so focused and clear. I had great company, I found an Ayurvedic Hospital that I want to check out and now I'm off to dinner.
Life is good, even with all my buttons being pushed, it's really beautiful. But if we don't have our buttons pushed we don't know they are there and how do we learn and grow. So look and listen for those buttons as they are our guidelines to where we need to grow. My patience and love is growing each day, my mind is calming (I think the Siddha medicine is working-something in having to care for yourself with oil twice a week and medication 3 times a day does something to the self caring) and so life is looking so beautiful.
I got a huge awakening yesterday that I want to find a new yoga community and go deeper into yoga and the practice and the living of yoga. I'm so excited by this, ever so thrilled. I feel this is a beautiful way to heal and grow and expand the mind and let go of the chatter. So I am researching yoga all over India, it's exciting yet so far everything starts in September and October, I'm sure it will work itself out!
Live your dreams, let your heart fly, speak your passions and dream your dreams that you dare to have come true and they will! I send you love, light, hugs and smiles. Many blessings and sweet dreams, Love, Heather
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Hospitals, Yoga and Challenges!!!! ; )
Dearest Ones,
Wow, wow, wow, the ups and downs of India! Everyday there are challenges and beauty. I see the beauty in the Indian faces I pass by more and more. I am staying in Varkala right now it's been over 2 weeks now. It's been a crazy time. I showed up with two glorious gals from Sivananda Ashram. The connection was gorgeous! I taught a few yoga classes while they were here and then I've taught a few others to some locals-my landlords, which was great they were open to it!
The coconut trees, the ocean and air just lulls me to sleep at night and swings me into restful state in my hammock by day. One of my landlords wants me to stay here, teach yoga, do hair cuts and teach dance to the tourists, as high season starts in a month here. It is very tempting, I could actually make quite the salary here but I'm not sure, so I'll live in the moment and see what happens. It's great to have options!
So since I've been in Varkala I've been to a few hospitals some are Ayurveda and Siddha healing centers and some are medical hospitals. Let me tell you if you ever need to get some treatment done, this is the place to do it, they are good and really cheap. I went in for a ultra sound for the fibroids and the whole thing with check up was $12.00 and they checked all my organs inside as well-liver, kidneys, spleen etc. So it was very thorough as well as they were so gentle, much more gentle then in the US-which for me was very traumatic to my body. I know what I am dealing with now, I am knowing my options, if I need surgery I know it's cheap- only $1000.00 but I really am looking for natural cures which I'm finding step by step!!!
I was so happy that a woman, Marie came with me with my landlord to the hospital for support, they were incredible waiting for me and just being there in the city of Trivandrum-the capital of Kerala. OH, something you may want to know, Kerala is the only place that has been voted in a communist state (I think in the world, not sure though), and it's the richest state in all of India. It is also half Christian here, a lot of Muslims and then Hindus. There are some fights between them, like some Hindus mades some commotion with some Muslims and got them thrown in jail and as they were in jail they went to their restaurant-which is all open air, not a 4 walled place, like most places here, and they threw all their things over the cliff into the ocean-television and all-pretty crazy, so now it's time for them to start redecorating again, now out of jail.
I went to a Siddha/Ayurveda hospital, they claim to be able to heal everything but 1st stage Diabetes and so I start the medicine tomorrow. I went 2 weeks ago and got the medicine but I got a fever for 3 evenings-crazy thing as I haven't had a fever in ages and I was hallucinating and thinking of things I hadn't thought of in years going in and out of consciousness. But luckily only a little cough is left. I am back to yoga and ready to start the Siddha medicine. I'm excited about all the options I'm finding-this world is truly fascinating, when you ask and open it brings a plentiful and variety of options. It's not always easy but it is truly wild what it brings and shows you. Especially with all the challenges of India on top of things.
I was just talking to my gorgeous freind Helene this morning about how people come to India and we are tested like crazy, from the dirty toilets, to the "the train will be here in 30 minutes" and it comes in 2 hours, to them saying maybe which means definately, to the head wobble from side to side (ear to ear) which means "maybe/yes", to the not being able to use a credit card as they can't get the phone line to work, to going to order a chai and since the cook is having breakfast you have to wait for them to finish first-you really get to see it's not all about "me" any more, it's about the whole, about people, about patience and being relaxed at all times, not being in a hurry or eating when they want you to eat at your hotel and not eating when you want to eat. The tests are here everyday but it's fun too.
Last night I went out with some girls for chai, one being my friend Helene from Australia (which I'll see once I am there!!! YES!), and it had been raining and I got up to go to the toilet. Let me say when it rains here it pours down so much the soil can't hold it so it causes huge puddles. The toilet it basically outside but with a door. I stepped into the toilet and walked up to the toilet and there was this deep puddle and I slipped and fell into this big puddle of water. At first it's like, "yikes, what am I laying in" as I get up, then it's they choice to get mad or laugh or both? So then I brushed myself off, went pee and laughed at it a moment later, thinking what a funny thing life, fall down, get back up and brush yourself off. Do we laugh or get mad? Sometimes I do both.
The Universe has been testing me lately. It's put me in this gorgeous place, with amazing healthy and loving dogs-that I've come an aunt to 4 pups lately, but then it puts me alone and then with people non stop, then all the 3 way friendships of how everyone interacts, one moment two talks, ones silent, 2 go off together, one is left alone, all the emotions that come up with it all. All the lack of communication when it would be so easy just to say/write "I'm going off to the beach see you later". I sometimes feel I come from a different planet. As I leave notes for people saying where I am and when I'm coming back-I guess my moms down home training is still in me, but others not being that way and being left dangling, it's a huge lesson, one of letting go of what I am used to.
Since when did we all become so independent, feeling like we don't need each other, feeling that we don't need to say something to another? I don't know, I sometimes feel like an alien, but it's ok, it just shows my differences, but I like that I'm this way. Talk about testing self acceptance, everyday there is another test in it. I know I've gotten quite independent at home and don't feel a need to explain where I am, but here I am starting to go back to my childhood, feeling it more powerfully and liking it as it seems much more human.
Here the Indians are always asking "where are you going? What are you doing? What's in the bag?" It comes across as nosy but at least they are interested, and sometimes it's irritating, but other times it feels so connected and human. So the tests go on. So some things to ponder, how are you in 3 way friendships-comfortable, uncomfortable, how do you respond to them? Where are you at with telling people where you will be? Does it feel like checking in with a parent or like freedom? How is your heart with change and difference with others? How are you challenged with the differences and the samenesses of others?
So here I am, healing, researching healing, growing, resisting, letting go, pushing, pulling, relaxing, straining and hopefully growing from all of it. Relaxing in the flow-hopefully anyway. Trying to let go of the future, the plans, the monkey mind that keeps chattering. But happy to feel how lucky I am to be here right now and feel grateful in life, even with all the challenges. How do you face challenges and the chattering inside?
I am learning to let all my sides come out lately. I'm not always comfortable with hanging out in 3 ways friendships, but lately I'm learning more and more to make people laugh and finding that the laughter really supports everyone. The two people I've been hanging out with here has commented on how everyone is so serious and how nice and refreshing it is to have me laughing and making them laugh-the feels so wonderful to know I can make them laugh. It is a balance to my serious side!!! ; ) Thank goodness!
Oh, I have to share a drink with you, take water, ginger and lemon and put them in a blender, mix them with some honey, strain it and drink it, it feels like pure energy and aliveness going down. I love this drink, it's not the same just squeezing it into a cup. It's so simple and yummy!
Another crazy thing happening here, there is a woman at the place next door, this is so India, her flight to Bombay is at 3:45am, she gets to the airport the first night, "sorry you are not on this list so you can't go as it's full", next day she spends the day trying to get a flight to Bombay, she gets some sleep, the next night she goes back, "sorry, it will be late and you will miss your flight to Paris so you might as well not go", she missed it again last night, I'm not sure why but I think this is India telling her not to go as she doesn't want to go. These are the crazy things of India.
Once India has you she doesn't want to let you go. I know when I had to leave India the first time-and I had to as my visa was to expire, I left and then cried and made myself sick wanting to come back. It's as if she gets right into your heart and doesn't want to let you go. Even as hard as it is at times, you are never the same and you always want to come back.
I'm have finally got a cell phone number here!!!! I'm so happy to be able to have some freedom to call places without having to look for a call box, and I feel blessed to be recieving phone calls from friends, so if you are interested in giving me a shout, my Indian cell phone number is 9995569611, if it's from the US you need to dial 011-91 first and then the number from what I've been told.
Ok loves, take care, I miss and love you. I send you hugs. Let me know how you are and what is up and new with you? May your heart be wrapped in a blanket of the softest love and lay upon a pillow of comfort, beauty and safety from within. Everyday we must learn to have self love and acceptance, enjoy the journey and know you are not alone. Your pain is all of our pain, as none of us have a pain someone can't relate too, even if it's different, we are all connected. Your joy is everyones joy, so lets share who we are in full-with all of our emotions, pain, laughter, etc. Love and bliss to you, Heather
Wow, wow, wow, the ups and downs of India! Everyday there are challenges and beauty. I see the beauty in the Indian faces I pass by more and more. I am staying in Varkala right now it's been over 2 weeks now. It's been a crazy time. I showed up with two glorious gals from Sivananda Ashram. The connection was gorgeous! I taught a few yoga classes while they were here and then I've taught a few others to some locals-my landlords, which was great they were open to it!
The coconut trees, the ocean and air just lulls me to sleep at night and swings me into restful state in my hammock by day. One of my landlords wants me to stay here, teach yoga, do hair cuts and teach dance to the tourists, as high season starts in a month here. It is very tempting, I could actually make quite the salary here but I'm not sure, so I'll live in the moment and see what happens. It's great to have options!
So since I've been in Varkala I've been to a few hospitals some are Ayurveda and Siddha healing centers and some are medical hospitals. Let me tell you if you ever need to get some treatment done, this is the place to do it, they are good and really cheap. I went in for a ultra sound for the fibroids and the whole thing with check up was $12.00 and they checked all my organs inside as well-liver, kidneys, spleen etc. So it was very thorough as well as they were so gentle, much more gentle then in the US-which for me was very traumatic to my body. I know what I am dealing with now, I am knowing my options, if I need surgery I know it's cheap- only $1000.00 but I really am looking for natural cures which I'm finding step by step!!!
I was so happy that a woman, Marie came with me with my landlord to the hospital for support, they were incredible waiting for me and just being there in the city of Trivandrum-the capital of Kerala. OH, something you may want to know, Kerala is the only place that has been voted in a communist state (I think in the world, not sure though), and it's the richest state in all of India. It is also half Christian here, a lot of Muslims and then Hindus. There are some fights between them, like some Hindus mades some commotion with some Muslims and got them thrown in jail and as they were in jail they went to their restaurant-which is all open air, not a 4 walled place, like most places here, and they threw all their things over the cliff into the ocean-television and all-pretty crazy, so now it's time for them to start redecorating again, now out of jail.
I went to a Siddha/Ayurveda hospital, they claim to be able to heal everything but 1st stage Diabetes and so I start the medicine tomorrow. I went 2 weeks ago and got the medicine but I got a fever for 3 evenings-crazy thing as I haven't had a fever in ages and I was hallucinating and thinking of things I hadn't thought of in years going in and out of consciousness. But luckily only a little cough is left. I am back to yoga and ready to start the Siddha medicine. I'm excited about all the options I'm finding-this world is truly fascinating, when you ask and open it brings a plentiful and variety of options. It's not always easy but it is truly wild what it brings and shows you. Especially with all the challenges of India on top of things.
I was just talking to my gorgeous freind Helene this morning about how people come to India and we are tested like crazy, from the dirty toilets, to the "the train will be here in 30 minutes" and it comes in 2 hours, to them saying maybe which means definately, to the head wobble from side to side (ear to ear) which means "maybe/yes", to the not being able to use a credit card as they can't get the phone line to work, to going to order a chai and since the cook is having breakfast you have to wait for them to finish first-you really get to see it's not all about "me" any more, it's about the whole, about people, about patience and being relaxed at all times, not being in a hurry or eating when they want you to eat at your hotel and not eating when you want to eat. The tests are here everyday but it's fun too.
Last night I went out with some girls for chai, one being my friend Helene from Australia (which I'll see once I am there!!! YES!), and it had been raining and I got up to go to the toilet. Let me say when it rains here it pours down so much the soil can't hold it so it causes huge puddles. The toilet it basically outside but with a door. I stepped into the toilet and walked up to the toilet and there was this deep puddle and I slipped and fell into this big puddle of water. At first it's like, "yikes, what am I laying in" as I get up, then it's they choice to get mad or laugh or both? So then I brushed myself off, went pee and laughed at it a moment later, thinking what a funny thing life, fall down, get back up and brush yourself off. Do we laugh or get mad? Sometimes I do both.
The Universe has been testing me lately. It's put me in this gorgeous place, with amazing healthy and loving dogs-that I've come an aunt to 4 pups lately, but then it puts me alone and then with people non stop, then all the 3 way friendships of how everyone interacts, one moment two talks, ones silent, 2 go off together, one is left alone, all the emotions that come up with it all. All the lack of communication when it would be so easy just to say/write "I'm going off to the beach see you later". I sometimes feel I come from a different planet. As I leave notes for people saying where I am and when I'm coming back-I guess my moms down home training is still in me, but others not being that way and being left dangling, it's a huge lesson, one of letting go of what I am used to.
Since when did we all become so independent, feeling like we don't need each other, feeling that we don't need to say something to another? I don't know, I sometimes feel like an alien, but it's ok, it just shows my differences, but I like that I'm this way. Talk about testing self acceptance, everyday there is another test in it. I know I've gotten quite independent at home and don't feel a need to explain where I am, but here I am starting to go back to my childhood, feeling it more powerfully and liking it as it seems much more human.
Here the Indians are always asking "where are you going? What are you doing? What's in the bag?" It comes across as nosy but at least they are interested, and sometimes it's irritating, but other times it feels so connected and human. So the tests go on. So some things to ponder, how are you in 3 way friendships-comfortable, uncomfortable, how do you respond to them? Where are you at with telling people where you will be? Does it feel like checking in with a parent or like freedom? How is your heart with change and difference with others? How are you challenged with the differences and the samenesses of others?
So here I am, healing, researching healing, growing, resisting, letting go, pushing, pulling, relaxing, straining and hopefully growing from all of it. Relaxing in the flow-hopefully anyway. Trying to let go of the future, the plans, the monkey mind that keeps chattering. But happy to feel how lucky I am to be here right now and feel grateful in life, even with all the challenges. How do you face challenges and the chattering inside?
I am learning to let all my sides come out lately. I'm not always comfortable with hanging out in 3 ways friendships, but lately I'm learning more and more to make people laugh and finding that the laughter really supports everyone. The two people I've been hanging out with here has commented on how everyone is so serious and how nice and refreshing it is to have me laughing and making them laugh-the feels so wonderful to know I can make them laugh. It is a balance to my serious side!!! ; ) Thank goodness!
Oh, I have to share a drink with you, take water, ginger and lemon and put them in a blender, mix them with some honey, strain it and drink it, it feels like pure energy and aliveness going down. I love this drink, it's not the same just squeezing it into a cup. It's so simple and yummy!
Another crazy thing happening here, there is a woman at the place next door, this is so India, her flight to Bombay is at 3:45am, she gets to the airport the first night, "sorry you are not on this list so you can't go as it's full", next day she spends the day trying to get a flight to Bombay, she gets some sleep, the next night she goes back, "sorry, it will be late and you will miss your flight to Paris so you might as well not go", she missed it again last night, I'm not sure why but I think this is India telling her not to go as she doesn't want to go. These are the crazy things of India.
Once India has you she doesn't want to let you go. I know when I had to leave India the first time-and I had to as my visa was to expire, I left and then cried and made myself sick wanting to come back. It's as if she gets right into your heart and doesn't want to let you go. Even as hard as it is at times, you are never the same and you always want to come back.
I'm have finally got a cell phone number here!!!! I'm so happy to be able to have some freedom to call places without having to look for a call box, and I feel blessed to be recieving phone calls from friends, so if you are interested in giving me a shout, my Indian cell phone number is 9995569611, if it's from the US you need to dial 011-91 first and then the number from what I've been told.
Ok loves, take care, I miss and love you. I send you hugs. Let me know how you are and what is up and new with you? May your heart be wrapped in a blanket of the softest love and lay upon a pillow of comfort, beauty and safety from within. Everyday we must learn to have self love and acceptance, enjoy the journey and know you are not alone. Your pain is all of our pain, as none of us have a pain someone can't relate too, even if it's different, we are all connected. Your joy is everyones joy, so lets share who we are in full-with all of our emotions, pain, laughter, etc. Love and bliss to you, Heather
Friday, June 22, 2007
Yoga-Scorpion, Lightning Bugs and Soggy
Hello there,
How are you? I hope joy is radiating all around and through you and may you carry a smile on the inside at all times. I send you many great big hugs.
As for me, I am still at the Sivananda Ashram. I can't seem to leave. I am met the most amazing people and am bonding with just gorgeous people, well women actually. I put it out there to connect with women and it's happening left and right. We are supporting each other, laughing, crying, hugging, snuggling, joking, eating, sharing fruit and stories with one another.
I want to put all of them in my bag and take them with me, especially two of them-Laura and Helene. Helene I'll be seeing in Sydney when I get there, but Laura she's off to England in a few days, she seems like a great sister. Oh, then there was Lawrence, she is the little sister I never had, OH my gosh I love her, she lives in Colorado so I'll be seeing her again. I got her up on stage dancing last week.
Last week I told you that there is a talent show, well I kind of went over board trying to get people up on stage and doing my own things as well. Well it was fun but I was pooped! I did 5 out of the 8 acts that got up. YIKES! I did a solo dance, a solo song, a duet dance with Lawrence, a trio with Viv and Laura and a duet with Viv. Wow it is so nice to play on stage.
Last week I taught a body awareness class through movement to everyone, plus sang and danced. It was nice to share my work with everyone. I'm not sure when I'm leaving but Laura already has me down to perform on Saturday, I told her I maybe gone by then.
I have mixed feelings. I am loving being here, but part of me is feeling trapped inside the walls of the ashram, only to be let out on Fridays. But what keeps me here are a few things, one is I can hold a head stand now for over 3 minutes, after 2 1/2 weeks I am doing the scorpion from the headstand with support from a teacher or the wall, within days I maybe doing it myself, yet I'm not touching my head with my toes yet.
This is an Asana where you are on your forearms and your body is up in the air, your back arched back and your feet come down to your head and your head is off the ground. So the only thing on the floor is your forearms. I never thought I'd be doing this, but it's amazing. What a powerful posture and so happy I'm strong enough and getting confident enough to start trying it on my own! I'm thrilled.
Plus I am loving the chanting. I think I'm going to start leading some of the chants. They are so lovely and stick in my head. I go to bed and wake up chanting. It's brilliant-what a gorgeous way to wake up! Funny, when I hear these words I hear an English accent as I'm around Laura-my lovely British friend! Makes me smile!!! ; ) Finding family every where around the world!
Of course doing this work all kinds of stuff comes up but thank goodness for the lake and thankfully the girls are there. I had an incredible breakdown the other day and Laura just held me for must have been 20-30 minutes and she would have held me longer but I couldn't breathe. Oh she reminds of my friends in Flagstaff, AZ where I was raised, such an open heart and trusting of life. It's so nice to be just loved so fully and completely. I am grateful for all of these situations, interactions and reminders of who I want to be when I grow up!!! ; ) The message is love, more love and a side order of love and listening of course!
The other amazing thing is there are tons of lightning bugs here, they get on your mosquito net and their little light bulb butt lights up a yellow green color as they walk around the net or fly around in eratic patterns of lighting and they light the whole room at times and in the bushes. So lovely to be so close to nature.
I've been doing visualization meditation for relaxation lately and all that comes to mind is being in nature, my feet in the grass or river, on the rocks, dancing in nature with flowing clothes on. Yet the visual of this home keeps coming to mind too, I wonder if I'll be finding it on this trip. I'll see. But I'm loving the visuals, my country girl nature wants to come out!
Since I've been here I've been touching, hugging and kissing as many people as I can as it's so nice to be close. I met this lovely women from Chili and I went up to her, kissed her cheek and gave her a hug and she responded with "you have Amma energy" well I'll take that as a compliment, how beautiful is that. I've always loved hugs, it's just my thing, thank goodness others get out of it some of what I do!!
I have to say I am loving the Yoga way of being, it's so tempting to just go study yoga but I'll have to see when or if the time is right. I love all the food and ways of being as a yogi. How lovely. Some of the teachers just blow me away. Yet I've been a little sore the past few days. But it's all good.
OH, here in Kerala everything is cooked with coconut. It's delicious! Try this-sprouted beans with fresh shredded coconut with a tad of onion and curry leaves, just barely warmed in coconut oil and steamed. It's my favorite! Also there is a lot of beets and carrots with coconut-yummy!
It is monsoon season here and when they say it rains, it rains. I am soggy, I've been soggy for days now and thinking of going north to get dry. I miss the warmth, yet it maybe too warm, I'll see. But I have friends up north so it wouldn't be so bad.
I am looking for different healers around India, found 2 doctors and though expensive they maybe what I'm looking for. If you've heard of Siddha Vaidya, then you know what I'm talking about, it's older than Ayurveda and it cures the disease where as Ayurveda is good for before and after the disease is cured.
Oh, diseases can be headaches, back aches, eye problems, fibroids, joint problems, anything really and they know of thousands of diseases just for the brain that we are born with. They work from the core outward. But I'd have to some how get money for that treatment. But I'm still researching it to make sure it's the best possibility of healing.
I am really hoping to get my wrist healed so I can continue doing healing with people once I'm home. Get my eyes back to seeing properly, some fibroids shunk and if I can find anyone that works post traumatic stress then that would be helpful as well so I can feel like myself again. If you know anything about healing these things I value any suggestions!
Oh, I haven't forgotten about photos, I'd love to send some but I haven't found a way to attach them yet, I've tried numberous times and it hasn't worked. So please be patient, we have to be with India, as it works it's own way and in it's own time.
So I send you hugs and love. I hope to be at the beach sometime in the next week to relax from ashram life and plan my next healing adventure for my heart, mind, spirit and body!
May you always have enough to keep you strong, giving, loving, happy and full of life. Know that now is a choice, you choose happy or sad, depressed or thrilled, how would you like to spend your day, moment, year, life? Remember you are giving up a day of your life for this day, how would you like to spend it?
Many hugs and kisses to you. I miss and love you, Heather
How are you? I hope joy is radiating all around and through you and may you carry a smile on the inside at all times. I send you many great big hugs.
As for me, I am still at the Sivananda Ashram. I can't seem to leave. I am met the most amazing people and am bonding with just gorgeous people, well women actually. I put it out there to connect with women and it's happening left and right. We are supporting each other, laughing, crying, hugging, snuggling, joking, eating, sharing fruit and stories with one another.
I want to put all of them in my bag and take them with me, especially two of them-Laura and Helene. Helene I'll be seeing in Sydney when I get there, but Laura she's off to England in a few days, she seems like a great sister. Oh, then there was Lawrence, she is the little sister I never had, OH my gosh I love her, she lives in Colorado so I'll be seeing her again. I got her up on stage dancing last week.
Last week I told you that there is a talent show, well I kind of went over board trying to get people up on stage and doing my own things as well. Well it was fun but I was pooped! I did 5 out of the 8 acts that got up. YIKES! I did a solo dance, a solo song, a duet dance with Lawrence, a trio with Viv and Laura and a duet with Viv. Wow it is so nice to play on stage.
Last week I taught a body awareness class through movement to everyone, plus sang and danced. It was nice to share my work with everyone. I'm not sure when I'm leaving but Laura already has me down to perform on Saturday, I told her I maybe gone by then.
I have mixed feelings. I am loving being here, but part of me is feeling trapped inside the walls of the ashram, only to be let out on Fridays. But what keeps me here are a few things, one is I can hold a head stand now for over 3 minutes, after 2 1/2 weeks I am doing the scorpion from the headstand with support from a teacher or the wall, within days I maybe doing it myself, yet I'm not touching my head with my toes yet.
This is an Asana where you are on your forearms and your body is up in the air, your back arched back and your feet come down to your head and your head is off the ground. So the only thing on the floor is your forearms. I never thought I'd be doing this, but it's amazing. What a powerful posture and so happy I'm strong enough and getting confident enough to start trying it on my own! I'm thrilled.
Plus I am loving the chanting. I think I'm going to start leading some of the chants. They are so lovely and stick in my head. I go to bed and wake up chanting. It's brilliant-what a gorgeous way to wake up! Funny, when I hear these words I hear an English accent as I'm around Laura-my lovely British friend! Makes me smile!!! ; ) Finding family every where around the world!
Of course doing this work all kinds of stuff comes up but thank goodness for the lake and thankfully the girls are there. I had an incredible breakdown the other day and Laura just held me for must have been 20-30 minutes and she would have held me longer but I couldn't breathe. Oh she reminds of my friends in Flagstaff, AZ where I was raised, such an open heart and trusting of life. It's so nice to be just loved so fully and completely. I am grateful for all of these situations, interactions and reminders of who I want to be when I grow up!!! ; ) The message is love, more love and a side order of love and listening of course!
The other amazing thing is there are tons of lightning bugs here, they get on your mosquito net and their little light bulb butt lights up a yellow green color as they walk around the net or fly around in eratic patterns of lighting and they light the whole room at times and in the bushes. So lovely to be so close to nature.
I've been doing visualization meditation for relaxation lately and all that comes to mind is being in nature, my feet in the grass or river, on the rocks, dancing in nature with flowing clothes on. Yet the visual of this home keeps coming to mind too, I wonder if I'll be finding it on this trip. I'll see. But I'm loving the visuals, my country girl nature wants to come out!
Since I've been here I've been touching, hugging and kissing as many people as I can as it's so nice to be close. I met this lovely women from Chili and I went up to her, kissed her cheek and gave her a hug and she responded with "you have Amma energy" well I'll take that as a compliment, how beautiful is that. I've always loved hugs, it's just my thing, thank goodness others get out of it some of what I do!!
I have to say I am loving the Yoga way of being, it's so tempting to just go study yoga but I'll have to see when or if the time is right. I love all the food and ways of being as a yogi. How lovely. Some of the teachers just blow me away. Yet I've been a little sore the past few days. But it's all good.
OH, here in Kerala everything is cooked with coconut. It's delicious! Try this-sprouted beans with fresh shredded coconut with a tad of onion and curry leaves, just barely warmed in coconut oil and steamed. It's my favorite! Also there is a lot of beets and carrots with coconut-yummy!
It is monsoon season here and when they say it rains, it rains. I am soggy, I've been soggy for days now and thinking of going north to get dry. I miss the warmth, yet it maybe too warm, I'll see. But I have friends up north so it wouldn't be so bad.
I am looking for different healers around India, found 2 doctors and though expensive they maybe what I'm looking for. If you've heard of Siddha Vaidya, then you know what I'm talking about, it's older than Ayurveda and it cures the disease where as Ayurveda is good for before and after the disease is cured.
Oh, diseases can be headaches, back aches, eye problems, fibroids, joint problems, anything really and they know of thousands of diseases just for the brain that we are born with. They work from the core outward. But I'd have to some how get money for that treatment. But I'm still researching it to make sure it's the best possibility of healing.
I am really hoping to get my wrist healed so I can continue doing healing with people once I'm home. Get my eyes back to seeing properly, some fibroids shunk and if I can find anyone that works post traumatic stress then that would be helpful as well so I can feel like myself again. If you know anything about healing these things I value any suggestions!
Oh, I haven't forgotten about photos, I'd love to send some but I haven't found a way to attach them yet, I've tried numberous times and it hasn't worked. So please be patient, we have to be with India, as it works it's own way and in it's own time.
So I send you hugs and love. I hope to be at the beach sometime in the next week to relax from ashram life and plan my next healing adventure for my heart, mind, spirit and body!
May you always have enough to keep you strong, giving, loving, happy and full of life. Know that now is a choice, you choose happy or sad, depressed or thrilled, how would you like to spend your day, moment, year, life? Remember you are giving up a day of your life for this day, how would you like to spend it?
Many hugs and kisses to you. I miss and love you, Heather
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Talent Show at the Ashram and Nose Floss!!!
Hello there My Lovely Friends,
How are you? What's up and new? What is your heart saying and feeling today???? As for me, I've been a the Sivananda Ashram now for a week now. It's truly amazing and so what I've been needing. My heart is happy here, I get a work out, I get to meditate (not as much as I'd like though), I get to be social and well....I'll tell you more in a bit.
So let me start by telling you the schedule-it's 5:30am rise and shine, 6-7am is Satsong where we meditate, chant amazing chants that I'm loving most of, a little word of Sivanandas work, more chanting/ending prayers and then Prasad-this is a little sweet that translates to Grace om english and it is chanted over and given to you in the morning an evening-all different kinds of prasad-fruit, fried fruit with sugar on them or dates. Then we have tea, do 2 hours of yoga, on to breakfast, then a talk on yoga, diet, etc, then karma yoga/service to the ashram, coaching on what ever you need, then yoga, dinner, satsong, prasad and then bed at 10pm-ish.
It's a very full day with little time alone and great people that you want to be social with so it's hard to not just take your space in the little free time.
But THIS PLACE IS GREAT!!!
Every Saturday they have a TALENT SHOW!!!! That's right, a talent show. Last week I got up and sang a duet with my friend Viv that I met at Amma's and then I danced to Lisa Gerard-the mirror pool album (the first track, just in case you want to know). Everyone went wild over it-well wild for an ashram anyway, even the main Swami thanked me in front of the whole crowd from bringing dance on stage and something different, HOW EXCITING! As I feared they may freak on me for doing such lustful things-yet it was quite a spiritual song so not too groovy, sexy or sensuousness.
But I'll be dancing again tomorrow twice, one a duet and a solo and then a singing duet and a solo. Oh, last week I got the dance captured on my camera!!!! So that's great! It's nice to have these things documented! I'm meeting great people and learning a ton about myself, yoga-which I'm just loving and the practices.
Speaking of some of the yoga practices, they do this great thing of taking salt water and putting it in a little container and then we do what I call nose douche and you put the container to your nose and let it pour out the other nostril. It gets out all kinds of lovely mucus, makes you snore, cough up stuff and get it all out.
But then comes the really fun part NOSE FLOSSING! You take this rubber cord and slowly stick it up your nose, inch by inch until it hits your tongue, then your reach back and grab it and pull it slowly through and you then proceed to floss back and forth-YOUR NOSE! I gets a ton of stuff out and it works! Don't try this at home without some kind of instruction! But it's interesting if you don't gag, throw up or anything. So now I no longer have to just floss my teeth but now my nose!!! More things to do in the morning I guess! All for good health.
Some people even swallow 6 cups of water and then make themselves puke so it cleans the stomach, I haven't tried this yet. But I'll think about it.
The food here is good, feels healthy, yet not enough raw. They said it's because it's not slow season and not enough staff to get raw fruits up there. But many of us will go out and get fruit as it's just so nice to have it around and so refreshing in this sticky weather. It's thankfully rainy season now and so it's so cool I don't need the fan at night but it's still muggy at times and the mosquitos love to come sneak up on you to take blood when you are holding an asana-they know you can't move so they can just take what they want from you.
OH, OH, OH!!!! I'm so excited, I did my first head stand by myself on the first day they instructed it AND I didn't fall over! They teach it so well here I'm so excited! As the last time I tried it in India I hurt myself, but they have it down in the teaching of the head stand and I can feel how healthy it is to be in this position!
I've considered doing the teacher training for yoga here just for the knowledge but I doubt I'll do it. It's not something I want to teach I just love all the info on health and how they believe and live. Well except the part that you should have no desire, lust and you should keep your energy to yourself so no sex. Well I'm sorry, that maybe for them but that's not my philosophy, I like Tantra myself, I am about inclusion of life and bringing up energy a different way thank you! But I can see how people can get sucked into this way of being as it's powerful!
You see all these amazing people going through their day, meditating, chanting, being fed, being of service to everyone and it makes you want to be part of it! I have seriously considered staying here for a few months, but I think I'd rather go visit a few more of their ashrams around India and not just be in one place.
The ashram had several people a week ago and just in the past few days everyone has cleared out so now there maybe 30 people here, well.....more like 20 people studying here now I think. It will be nice as there will be more space and time to ones self.
I'm loving doing food service here, yet it's a little tricky with no speach during the two meals a day, as you just have to guess if people want something and go over to them and see if they look up and signal yes or no to what you have. Talk about serving, it really shows me how servants had to have been way back then or even now in some places, watching your every move to see what you may want-reminds me of The Color Purple.
Oh the other night everyone in the ashram went for a night walk to the lake, it was so nice to outside at night walking and seeing the stars, how lovely! We all sat at the lake to meditate and chant, just beautiful. A few lights on the lake from a few homes on it, the sky dark but for the stars and the outline of the palm and coconut trees around the lake. Really breath taking! We do that walk in the morning once a week too!
I really get how someone can stay a while here. You can swim in the lake. Well let me explain this statement. It's not like stripping off and going skinny dipping. Nothing of the sort, here in India. It's more like you have all your clothes on-in which you want to wash as they want you to wash yourself and your clothes down in the lake to conserve water. So here you are dressed from head to ankle and you walk into the water and hope and pray the rumours of aligators in the lake are a myth or have been taken out of the lake by now. But still you swim with one eye open curious about them!
So I'm good, I'm happy, I'm getting better in yoga and trying new things-like the head stand by myself! Now I'm meeting a few people that want to do cleansing as well, so we may all go and do it together which would be nice. Plus I talked one of the teachers into teaching a class on cleansing so that will be on Monday!
I hope you are well. It's funny as I sit here they are throwing fire crackers outside every minute and it feels and sounds like a bomb, so coming from the ashram it's a little shocking. But I am doing great other than the shock waves of those things!!! ; )
May your heart be happy, sing, dance, play and may you find more hidden belief in yourself every day! The people here are never taught to question themselves with low self esteem or confidence so here they get up and just chant out of tune, off key and out of rhythm and love it! It took a little bit to realize how nice it was to just have them be them and them show self acceptance so beautifully.
I have found some new people to hug and touch and play with which feels really good! I really get I need that in my weekly, if not daily life.
Well I'm off, I love you, send you hugs. I hope to hear from you soon at my email address at: gypsysundancer@yahoo.com. Remember to be happy and do things that make your heart thrilled to be alive. Love and passion to you, Heather
Everyday feel what it feels like to live a passion filled day! XXXOOO
How are you? What's up and new? What is your heart saying and feeling today???? As for me, I've been a the Sivananda Ashram now for a week now. It's truly amazing and so what I've been needing. My heart is happy here, I get a work out, I get to meditate (not as much as I'd like though), I get to be social and well....I'll tell you more in a bit.
So let me start by telling you the schedule-it's 5:30am rise and shine, 6-7am is Satsong where we meditate, chant amazing chants that I'm loving most of, a little word of Sivanandas work, more chanting/ending prayers and then Prasad-this is a little sweet that translates to Grace om english and it is chanted over and given to you in the morning an evening-all different kinds of prasad-fruit, fried fruit with sugar on them or dates. Then we have tea, do 2 hours of yoga, on to breakfast, then a talk on yoga, diet, etc, then karma yoga/service to the ashram, coaching on what ever you need, then yoga, dinner, satsong, prasad and then bed at 10pm-ish.
It's a very full day with little time alone and great people that you want to be social with so it's hard to not just take your space in the little free time.
But THIS PLACE IS GREAT!!!
Every Saturday they have a TALENT SHOW!!!! That's right, a talent show. Last week I got up and sang a duet with my friend Viv that I met at Amma's and then I danced to Lisa Gerard-the mirror pool album (the first track, just in case you want to know). Everyone went wild over it-well wild for an ashram anyway, even the main Swami thanked me in front of the whole crowd from bringing dance on stage and something different, HOW EXCITING! As I feared they may freak on me for doing such lustful things-yet it was quite a spiritual song so not too groovy, sexy or sensuousness.
But I'll be dancing again tomorrow twice, one a duet and a solo and then a singing duet and a solo. Oh, last week I got the dance captured on my camera!!!! So that's great! It's nice to have these things documented! I'm meeting great people and learning a ton about myself, yoga-which I'm just loving and the practices.
Speaking of some of the yoga practices, they do this great thing of taking salt water and putting it in a little container and then we do what I call nose douche and you put the container to your nose and let it pour out the other nostril. It gets out all kinds of lovely mucus, makes you snore, cough up stuff and get it all out.
But then comes the really fun part NOSE FLOSSING! You take this rubber cord and slowly stick it up your nose, inch by inch until it hits your tongue, then your reach back and grab it and pull it slowly through and you then proceed to floss back and forth-YOUR NOSE! I gets a ton of stuff out and it works! Don't try this at home without some kind of instruction! But it's interesting if you don't gag, throw up or anything. So now I no longer have to just floss my teeth but now my nose!!! More things to do in the morning I guess! All for good health.
Some people even swallow 6 cups of water and then make themselves puke so it cleans the stomach, I haven't tried this yet. But I'll think about it.
The food here is good, feels healthy, yet not enough raw. They said it's because it's not slow season and not enough staff to get raw fruits up there. But many of us will go out and get fruit as it's just so nice to have it around and so refreshing in this sticky weather. It's thankfully rainy season now and so it's so cool I don't need the fan at night but it's still muggy at times and the mosquitos love to come sneak up on you to take blood when you are holding an asana-they know you can't move so they can just take what they want from you.
OH, OH, OH!!!! I'm so excited, I did my first head stand by myself on the first day they instructed it AND I didn't fall over! They teach it so well here I'm so excited! As the last time I tried it in India I hurt myself, but they have it down in the teaching of the head stand and I can feel how healthy it is to be in this position!
I've considered doing the teacher training for yoga here just for the knowledge but I doubt I'll do it. It's not something I want to teach I just love all the info on health and how they believe and live. Well except the part that you should have no desire, lust and you should keep your energy to yourself so no sex. Well I'm sorry, that maybe for them but that's not my philosophy, I like Tantra myself, I am about inclusion of life and bringing up energy a different way thank you! But I can see how people can get sucked into this way of being as it's powerful!
You see all these amazing people going through their day, meditating, chanting, being fed, being of service to everyone and it makes you want to be part of it! I have seriously considered staying here for a few months, but I think I'd rather go visit a few more of their ashrams around India and not just be in one place.
The ashram had several people a week ago and just in the past few days everyone has cleared out so now there maybe 30 people here, well.....more like 20 people studying here now I think. It will be nice as there will be more space and time to ones self.
I'm loving doing food service here, yet it's a little tricky with no speach during the two meals a day, as you just have to guess if people want something and go over to them and see if they look up and signal yes or no to what you have. Talk about serving, it really shows me how servants had to have been way back then or even now in some places, watching your every move to see what you may want-reminds me of The Color Purple.
Oh the other night everyone in the ashram went for a night walk to the lake, it was so nice to outside at night walking and seeing the stars, how lovely! We all sat at the lake to meditate and chant, just beautiful. A few lights on the lake from a few homes on it, the sky dark but for the stars and the outline of the palm and coconut trees around the lake. Really breath taking! We do that walk in the morning once a week too!
I really get how someone can stay a while here. You can swim in the lake. Well let me explain this statement. It's not like stripping off and going skinny dipping. Nothing of the sort, here in India. It's more like you have all your clothes on-in which you want to wash as they want you to wash yourself and your clothes down in the lake to conserve water. So here you are dressed from head to ankle and you walk into the water and hope and pray the rumours of aligators in the lake are a myth or have been taken out of the lake by now. But still you swim with one eye open curious about them!
So I'm good, I'm happy, I'm getting better in yoga and trying new things-like the head stand by myself! Now I'm meeting a few people that want to do cleansing as well, so we may all go and do it together which would be nice. Plus I talked one of the teachers into teaching a class on cleansing so that will be on Monday!
I hope you are well. It's funny as I sit here they are throwing fire crackers outside every minute and it feels and sounds like a bomb, so coming from the ashram it's a little shocking. But I am doing great other than the shock waves of those things!!! ; )
May your heart be happy, sing, dance, play and may you find more hidden belief in yourself every day! The people here are never taught to question themselves with low self esteem or confidence so here they get up and just chant out of tune, off key and out of rhythm and love it! It took a little bit to realize how nice it was to just have them be them and them show self acceptance so beautifully.
I have found some new people to hug and touch and play with which feels really good! I really get I need that in my weekly, if not daily life.
Well I'm off, I love you, send you hugs. I hope to hear from you soon at my email address at: gypsysundancer@yahoo.com. Remember to be happy and do things that make your heart thrilled to be alive. Love and passion to you, Heather
Everyday feel what it feels like to live a passion filled day! XXXOOO
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Sloppin' in oil!!!
Hello there,
How are you? How is life? Your heart and soul? As for me I'm doing swell!!!! I am in a rhythem with where I am now. I get up at 6:30 or 7am, I meditate, at 7:30 I am given a delicious breakfast from the woman who works here at the wellness center (well, if you can call it that-more on that later), I eat, do some stretches, read a little go in for my first treatment for relaxing the mind and then I relax, have lunch, have another treatment that I hope is healing my wrists but more feels like pain and being a little beaten up by these cloth balls of fabric filled with herbs and hot milk. Well let me back up, first this center, humm.....how do I describe this place.
The outside is a bright green, nice a clean. walk in it's fine, a little dark, with florescent lights. Then you go into the middle room where the doctors do their consultations, none of it half bad, floors a permentantly dirty but cleaned twice daily, but it's when you get into the bathrooms you wonder. humm.....You see since only a low cast can only clean toilets they don't get cleaned all that well, the walls are stained with years of you don't want to know what. but at least the room where they work is clean and has windows and is nice.
So let me tell you about the massages, I first come in, they aren't ready but they still want me to take off my clothes, they say "change" which means, strip. I sit there waiting for them to get ready then they keep telling me to change until I strip and have to wait for them naked while one of the massage therapist women loves to stare at me. She wants my skin, I think she likes working on me hoping it will rub off, as the Indians here believe light skin is beautiful, they go around each day trying to bleach their skin with this or that lotion-same with thailand. Yikes! How is there health from this? Anyway, I get on this very tall, all wood massage table with the edges lower then the rest for oil, milk and medication drainage and holes at the top and bottom to drain these things from the table. They first have to put a towel under my cute little boney butt as the wood is not condusive to thin people, the women here have an extra layer of padding so they don't have this problem. The great thing about having padding, no pain with the knees while being on my belly or my ankles when they slide them into the side of the walls of the massage table.
Anyway, so it begins that I lay down, the do a 45 minute very fast, rub down to get the circulation going and to rejuvinate the body, after that they place my head under a steel pot that has a large wick hanging out of a hole in the center of the pot. The warm this oil up and pour it through the whole and it lands on my forehead or the top of my head. As it seeps out pouring onto me they jerk and shove my head from side to side trying to get the sides-as I crack up as it's so not relaxing to be pushed around, but I relax anyway. I'm not sure how these women hold a baby, they can be so rough, but they do it with such love, it's amazing. They massage the oil through your hair and in your hair line and on your forehead for 45 minutes and then they sit me up, wipe me up, wipe up the table and then down the 3 steps off the table into the bathroom for one of the women to bathe me, yes she bathes me! Humm....never had this from a professional before, from head to toe, well, except my pink parts between my legs, that's for me to do, she does everything else without embarrassment!
For the second massage they wipe me down with oil first for 10-15 minutes. Then they heat up hot milk with medicine and they put these hot pouches of herbs in the hot milk at first they procede to beat me up with them, pounding away sloshing milk every where in the room! It's great, after the first minute the pouches loosen up and it feels much nicer, plus I have a few less layers of skin from the pouches afterward, what a kick! ;) They even go right up between my legs, I just hope it continues to be warm and not hot milk up there, yikes! So the milk keeps getting hotter and hotter until you can barely handle it and then they squeeze the milk out of your injured areas, then they sit me up, scrape me down with a leaf of some sort to get the milk stuff off, then they lather me up with oil again and off for another bath again from them! Then I'm off to rest until the next meal.
They love to eat 4 times a day here, 8am, 12pm, 4pm, 9pm. They try to feed me that late but I just can't handle it. But the cook is so sweet, it's hard to say no, but she keeps bringing it at 7 or 8pm now as she knows 9 is too late for me.
The women here feel so strong on the outside but they constantly have to have me reinforce if I liked their food or if I liked the massage or did I like what ever it was that they did for me....it's constant validation for them. They get upset really easily and get hurt and think that I don't like them, when I maybe having a bad day that has nothing to do with them. I've never know Indians to be so sensitive but I guess underneith we are all sensitive. I really think about me in this, I watched the movie Million dollar baby the other night-yes they have cable there, and at the end I realized her manager was so hard on the outside and soft on the inside, that is really how I see me, once I know people I let that side out, but otherwise I come across really hard or strong or what ever, a little shell but then once you get inside I'm all soft, so maybe these women and I have a lot in common, funny to see a reflection in the extreme.
The manager, the owners wife, is the only one that speaks english and she is barely starting to grow on me, as she was so matter of fact and business and then changing everything everyday that it drove me crazy. but I see she's just as soft on the inside too, people are funny creatures, aren't we? Yes we are.
So I have no idea if this Ayurvedic stuff is working but hey I get bathed in milk and oil everyday and get bathed, so what can you say for $34.00 a day, yes the price is double, don't ask, it's India! I'll see if it works in another week or so. I'm here until Friday and then I'm off the the Sivananda Ashram for Yoga, meditation and Ayurvedic medicine. I'm excited about being their, the photos are gorgeous, lots of greenery, lakes, etc in the area.
There is only garbage scattered around amongst the palm trees at my place, an unused well, a deep hole where water gathers doing no good, a fire with rice cooking in it all day smoking up the back yard and a great place to do laundry, but no real view or sitting places. Though I'm not to be outside in the weather, under fans or in a breeze for doing the work I'm doing. Lot's of rules with this work and I have to find them out as I break them as there is no for warning, but at least I know now what I know!!!! : )
The commercials here are crazy, they show women in 2 piece bathing suits, which I've never seen an Indian woman in, I almost blush when it comes on as I'm in mixed company of people that don't see that stuff. Then this commercial for a mens cologne comes on like Vio and it says "makes nice girls naughty" and shows photos of women having their men with fruit and whip cream all over then or stamping the guys chest, as if whipping him with a stamp in a library, it's odd, but who knows maybe it sells, it stuck in my mind. One of my favorite commericials if for their holiday packages and the tune is something like, you happy, me happy, we happy. It's so cute.
Anyway, it's nice here, I'm calming here, having to relax as their is nothing else to do. I can't leave the place, well except right now as I had to go to the ATM to pay them and thought I'd write you!!! I miss you, I miss my friends from Amma's. OH, I almost forgot, my last day there was fabulous. I'm so bummed I forgot my recorder. I got up that morning to rain, but it stopped so I could do my yoga on the roof and have my chai anyway. Then I had breakfast, at lunch time us girls got together and with the ukulele and guitar sang in perfect harmony Ring of Fire and they insisted I sing Crazy one or two more times as they loved to hear me sing it, hit the high notes. I'm so sad I don't have it recorded but I may have one more chance to record with one of my friends at Sivananda, won't be the same but still, it's still recorded.
Then that evening we all three got together for a see ya later ceremony, it was glorious, the most special thing I've done in so long with close girlfriends.
I won't go into all of it, but my favorite part I'll share with you and really encourage everyone to do this with their friends as it's so powerful. After calling in the energies of the North, East, South and West, and telling our reasons for being in India and what we've done or been through in the past 4 months and let go of things and places our goals. Then the most brilliant thing: 2 at a time told the other one how they saw them, how amazing they were, smart, beautiful, creative, talented, communicative, loving, mothering, passionate, brave, courageous, you are so child like, I love that you touch so much, hug so much I need that, inclusive, how they wanted to be like the other or how their should be more people like them in this world...it went on and on.
Just think, when was the last time you told someone all the wonderful things you loved and saw in them and had them sit there, couldn't say anything but thank you and had to receive it, maybe cry, maybe laugh, but receive it how they could do it best. For me I felt like a little girl all giggles and it's be most I've received in one sitting and it was fabulous. There was so much I could tell you that I loved of what they said and how shocked I was in some of it, but to hear how inclusive I was to the point of one of them saying "you insisted I sit with you at your table as you knew I was new and wanted to include me with your friends. There needs to be more people like you in this world". How lovely to take it in, bathe in it and hear it. I really recommmend it for everyone to do, even if they can't fully receive it or you. How wonderful it would be, I forget so often but hopefully I'll remember more now.
By the end of it we felt so full, so filled up with love and light by giving such a gift and receiving such a gift, how lovely! None of us wanted to leave the next day. It's like all felt like we first really connected and didn't want to let it go. But two of us left anyway the next day and it was sad, I missed them a lot but you somehow get back on your feet when you have too and move on to the next exciting thing in life. And my exciting thing is healing, healing here and then next to Yoga and meditation. I'm excited to see my girlfriend down there if she's still there.
So I'm sure there is a ton more I can say. But I should probably sign off now.
Know that I love you and think of you often. Do something exciting everyday, even if it's small. Are you living full out, celebrating life as much as possible in each moment? Maybe an hour off work early and runnning your toes through the sand would do you some good, or going to tea with a friend just to talk about nothing, but to laugh at life. I am laughing more at life now days, thank goodness! Getting lighter with it and seeing humor in life in each moment of being human, even if it's the after effect. Know that we are to enjoy this journey in this body, we only have this body once, so lets not look at the future but what's before us right now!
I send you love, hugs, giggles and a GREAT BIG SMILE for your day, week and year, Love, Heather
How are you? How is life? Your heart and soul? As for me I'm doing swell!!!! I am in a rhythem with where I am now. I get up at 6:30 or 7am, I meditate, at 7:30 I am given a delicious breakfast from the woman who works here at the wellness center (well, if you can call it that-more on that later), I eat, do some stretches, read a little go in for my first treatment for relaxing the mind and then I relax, have lunch, have another treatment that I hope is healing my wrists but more feels like pain and being a little beaten up by these cloth balls of fabric filled with herbs and hot milk. Well let me back up, first this center, humm.....how do I describe this place.
The outside is a bright green, nice a clean. walk in it's fine, a little dark, with florescent lights. Then you go into the middle room where the doctors do their consultations, none of it half bad, floors a permentantly dirty but cleaned twice daily, but it's when you get into the bathrooms you wonder. humm.....You see since only a low cast can only clean toilets they don't get cleaned all that well, the walls are stained with years of you don't want to know what. but at least the room where they work is clean and has windows and is nice.
So let me tell you about the massages, I first come in, they aren't ready but they still want me to take off my clothes, they say "change" which means, strip. I sit there waiting for them to get ready then they keep telling me to change until I strip and have to wait for them naked while one of the massage therapist women loves to stare at me. She wants my skin, I think she likes working on me hoping it will rub off, as the Indians here believe light skin is beautiful, they go around each day trying to bleach their skin with this or that lotion-same with thailand. Yikes! How is there health from this? Anyway, I get on this very tall, all wood massage table with the edges lower then the rest for oil, milk and medication drainage and holes at the top and bottom to drain these things from the table. They first have to put a towel under my cute little boney butt as the wood is not condusive to thin people, the women here have an extra layer of padding so they don't have this problem. The great thing about having padding, no pain with the knees while being on my belly or my ankles when they slide them into the side of the walls of the massage table.
Anyway, so it begins that I lay down, the do a 45 minute very fast, rub down to get the circulation going and to rejuvinate the body, after that they place my head under a steel pot that has a large wick hanging out of a hole in the center of the pot. The warm this oil up and pour it through the whole and it lands on my forehead or the top of my head. As it seeps out pouring onto me they jerk and shove my head from side to side trying to get the sides-as I crack up as it's so not relaxing to be pushed around, but I relax anyway. I'm not sure how these women hold a baby, they can be so rough, but they do it with such love, it's amazing. They massage the oil through your hair and in your hair line and on your forehead for 45 minutes and then they sit me up, wipe me up, wipe up the table and then down the 3 steps off the table into the bathroom for one of the women to bathe me, yes she bathes me! Humm....never had this from a professional before, from head to toe, well, except my pink parts between my legs, that's for me to do, she does everything else without embarrassment!
For the second massage they wipe me down with oil first for 10-15 minutes. Then they heat up hot milk with medicine and they put these hot pouches of herbs in the hot milk at first they procede to beat me up with them, pounding away sloshing milk every where in the room! It's great, after the first minute the pouches loosen up and it feels much nicer, plus I have a few less layers of skin from the pouches afterward, what a kick! ;) They even go right up between my legs, I just hope it continues to be warm and not hot milk up there, yikes! So the milk keeps getting hotter and hotter until you can barely handle it and then they squeeze the milk out of your injured areas, then they sit me up, scrape me down with a leaf of some sort to get the milk stuff off, then they lather me up with oil again and off for another bath again from them! Then I'm off to rest until the next meal.
They love to eat 4 times a day here, 8am, 12pm, 4pm, 9pm. They try to feed me that late but I just can't handle it. But the cook is so sweet, it's hard to say no, but she keeps bringing it at 7 or 8pm now as she knows 9 is too late for me.
The women here feel so strong on the outside but they constantly have to have me reinforce if I liked their food or if I liked the massage or did I like what ever it was that they did for me....it's constant validation for them. They get upset really easily and get hurt and think that I don't like them, when I maybe having a bad day that has nothing to do with them. I've never know Indians to be so sensitive but I guess underneith we are all sensitive. I really think about me in this, I watched the movie Million dollar baby the other night-yes they have cable there, and at the end I realized her manager was so hard on the outside and soft on the inside, that is really how I see me, once I know people I let that side out, but otherwise I come across really hard or strong or what ever, a little shell but then once you get inside I'm all soft, so maybe these women and I have a lot in common, funny to see a reflection in the extreme.
The manager, the owners wife, is the only one that speaks english and she is barely starting to grow on me, as she was so matter of fact and business and then changing everything everyday that it drove me crazy. but I see she's just as soft on the inside too, people are funny creatures, aren't we? Yes we are.
So I have no idea if this Ayurvedic stuff is working but hey I get bathed in milk and oil everyday and get bathed, so what can you say for $34.00 a day, yes the price is double, don't ask, it's India! I'll see if it works in another week or so. I'm here until Friday and then I'm off the the Sivananda Ashram for Yoga, meditation and Ayurvedic medicine. I'm excited about being their, the photos are gorgeous, lots of greenery, lakes, etc in the area.
There is only garbage scattered around amongst the palm trees at my place, an unused well, a deep hole where water gathers doing no good, a fire with rice cooking in it all day smoking up the back yard and a great place to do laundry, but no real view or sitting places. Though I'm not to be outside in the weather, under fans or in a breeze for doing the work I'm doing. Lot's of rules with this work and I have to find them out as I break them as there is no for warning, but at least I know now what I know!!!! : )
The commercials here are crazy, they show women in 2 piece bathing suits, which I've never seen an Indian woman in, I almost blush when it comes on as I'm in mixed company of people that don't see that stuff. Then this commercial for a mens cologne comes on like Vio and it says "makes nice girls naughty" and shows photos of women having their men with fruit and whip cream all over then or stamping the guys chest, as if whipping him with a stamp in a library, it's odd, but who knows maybe it sells, it stuck in my mind. One of my favorite commericials if for their holiday packages and the tune is something like, you happy, me happy, we happy. It's so cute.
Anyway, it's nice here, I'm calming here, having to relax as their is nothing else to do. I can't leave the place, well except right now as I had to go to the ATM to pay them and thought I'd write you!!! I miss you, I miss my friends from Amma's. OH, I almost forgot, my last day there was fabulous. I'm so bummed I forgot my recorder. I got up that morning to rain, but it stopped so I could do my yoga on the roof and have my chai anyway. Then I had breakfast, at lunch time us girls got together and with the ukulele and guitar sang in perfect harmony Ring of Fire and they insisted I sing Crazy one or two more times as they loved to hear me sing it, hit the high notes. I'm so sad I don't have it recorded but I may have one more chance to record with one of my friends at Sivananda, won't be the same but still, it's still recorded.
Then that evening we all three got together for a see ya later ceremony, it was glorious, the most special thing I've done in so long with close girlfriends.
I won't go into all of it, but my favorite part I'll share with you and really encourage everyone to do this with their friends as it's so powerful. After calling in the energies of the North, East, South and West, and telling our reasons for being in India and what we've done or been through in the past 4 months and let go of things and places our goals. Then the most brilliant thing: 2 at a time told the other one how they saw them, how amazing they were, smart, beautiful, creative, talented, communicative, loving, mothering, passionate, brave, courageous, you are so child like, I love that you touch so much, hug so much I need that, inclusive, how they wanted to be like the other or how their should be more people like them in this world...it went on and on.
Just think, when was the last time you told someone all the wonderful things you loved and saw in them and had them sit there, couldn't say anything but thank you and had to receive it, maybe cry, maybe laugh, but receive it how they could do it best. For me I felt like a little girl all giggles and it's be most I've received in one sitting and it was fabulous. There was so much I could tell you that I loved of what they said and how shocked I was in some of it, but to hear how inclusive I was to the point of one of them saying "you insisted I sit with you at your table as you knew I was new and wanted to include me with your friends. There needs to be more people like you in this world". How lovely to take it in, bathe in it and hear it. I really recommmend it for everyone to do, even if they can't fully receive it or you. How wonderful it would be, I forget so often but hopefully I'll remember more now.
By the end of it we felt so full, so filled up with love and light by giving such a gift and receiving such a gift, how lovely! None of us wanted to leave the next day. It's like all felt like we first really connected and didn't want to let it go. But two of us left anyway the next day and it was sad, I missed them a lot but you somehow get back on your feet when you have too and move on to the next exciting thing in life. And my exciting thing is healing, healing here and then next to Yoga and meditation. I'm excited to see my girlfriend down there if she's still there.
So I'm sure there is a ton more I can say. But I should probably sign off now.
Know that I love you and think of you often. Do something exciting everyday, even if it's small. Are you living full out, celebrating life as much as possible in each moment? Maybe an hour off work early and runnning your toes through the sand would do you some good, or going to tea with a friend just to talk about nothing, but to laugh at life. I am laughing more at life now days, thank goodness! Getting lighter with it and seeing humor in life in each moment of being human, even if it's the after effect. Know that we are to enjoy this journey in this body, we only have this body once, so lets not look at the future but what's before us right now!
I send you love, hugs, giggles and a GREAT BIG SMILE for your day, week and year, Love, Heather
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
singin' and a dancin'
Hello there again,
Well much has shifted in the past few days! I'm so excited! First my girlfriends and I have been getting together and singing. One plays the ukelelee(sp?) and the other one plays the guitar and we are just singing at the top of our lungs just letting it rip harmonizing beautifully and now people have joined us.
Yet our group is splitting up, one has left already yesterday morning, my roommate. And so now there are three. We have all decided separately we are leaving on Thursday. One of my friends may come with me to a wellness center. This is very exciting for me, it has Ayurvedic massage, cleansing, purifications, nasal clearing, all kinds of things with yoga and meditation, food and room for about $17.00 a day! I'm thrilled about this.
This morning is the first morning I got to dance in India and it felt great. I'm full of life and energy. I'm just ready to go cleanse, heal and get this body massaged!!!!
Yesterday I danced for the first time in India and it felt great!!! Tonight we will be doing a little celebration on the beach with music and dancing to say good bye as we go our separate ways. It's been so beautiful to be with women and for so long. There is something about being with people on going for over a week or so, it feels like a few months.
It would be so easy to stay in some ways as here I get up at 5:50am, have Chai, yummmm! Then go off to yoga and meditation and then meet with the girls for breakfast and chatting for a while afterward. We do our sevas/volunteer work, get a little alone time before lunch of more lovely Indian food (Breakfast and Dinner is water rice and veggies, supposedly it's good for kidneys, and then Lunch is solid rice and veggies), then we get together to eat, talk, sing, have a juice, get a little alone time, sometimes I've gone to the ocean, it's got the craziest waves so high out here, and then Bhajan until 8pm-chanting and then dinner. I crash around 10:30pm-ish. It's good. But I haven't actually gotten an 8 hour sleep since Calcutta. It seems like I don't need much sleep, some nights I only get 4 hours, but it feels good to be up at 4am doing my own thing.
Well I'm off to the wellness center tomorrow and haven't a clue if they have email so if I don't write back soon, know that I'm thinking of you and cleansing!!!! Much love, many hugs, keep your heart open, Love, Heather
Well much has shifted in the past few days! I'm so excited! First my girlfriends and I have been getting together and singing. One plays the ukelelee(sp?) and the other one plays the guitar and we are just singing at the top of our lungs just letting it rip harmonizing beautifully and now people have joined us.
Yet our group is splitting up, one has left already yesterday morning, my roommate. And so now there are three. We have all decided separately we are leaving on Thursday. One of my friends may come with me to a wellness center. This is very exciting for me, it has Ayurvedic massage, cleansing, purifications, nasal clearing, all kinds of things with yoga and meditation, food and room for about $17.00 a day! I'm thrilled about this.
This morning is the first morning I got to dance in India and it felt great. I'm full of life and energy. I'm just ready to go cleanse, heal and get this body massaged!!!!
Yesterday I danced for the first time in India and it felt great!!! Tonight we will be doing a little celebration on the beach with music and dancing to say good bye as we go our separate ways. It's been so beautiful to be with women and for so long. There is something about being with people on going for over a week or so, it feels like a few months.
It would be so easy to stay in some ways as here I get up at 5:50am, have Chai, yummmm! Then go off to yoga and meditation and then meet with the girls for breakfast and chatting for a while afterward. We do our sevas/volunteer work, get a little alone time before lunch of more lovely Indian food (Breakfast and Dinner is water rice and veggies, supposedly it's good for kidneys, and then Lunch is solid rice and veggies), then we get together to eat, talk, sing, have a juice, get a little alone time, sometimes I've gone to the ocean, it's got the craziest waves so high out here, and then Bhajan until 8pm-chanting and then dinner. I crash around 10:30pm-ish. It's good. But I haven't actually gotten an 8 hour sleep since Calcutta. It seems like I don't need much sleep, some nights I only get 4 hours, but it feels good to be up at 4am doing my own thing.
Well I'm off to the wellness center tomorrow and haven't a clue if they have email so if I don't write back soon, know that I'm thinking of you and cleansing!!!! Much love, many hugs, keep your heart open, Love, Heather
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