Hello there,
How are you? How is your life? Your family and friends? I am doing great, doing lots of contiplating, meditating, being and trying to let of what ever plan I think I have-crazy I'm on holiday and I'm still planning-yikes! Yet some is necessary. For example: I HAVE BOUGHT MY TICKET TO AUSTRALIA!!!!! Yes it's actually happening, my dream of going to OZ is happening- a long awaited dream since probably childhood when my mother would talk about Australia and how she wanted to go and how beautiful it was and watching Crocidile Dundie movies and being excited about being there. Well on Oct 24th I fly from Phuket (it's pronounced Poo ket, not fuckit'!!!!) Thailand and get into Sydney on Oct 25th. So if you are around I'd love to see you there.
Oh and since we are on the subject of planning. You are invited to my birthday party-yes I am planning one even if it's only me, I'll be there!!!! I'm planning on being in Byron Bay, Australia and hopefully in the wilderness or on the beach with friends, dancing, laughing, sharing, playing games and anything else that comes to mind on November 25th-I also give notice just in case you may want to fly out!!! hint hint!!! ; )
Last time I wrote I was in Pushkar, wonderful amazing, loving, Pushkar-so many lessons of being, still being absorbed, so much beauty, so many great people that I met on the street. Walking down the street saying hello to all the locals, eating at my favorite places and meeting new friends, dodging the cows-that have tripled in 7 years since I've been here, dodging the people, dogs, the push carts that call them selves rickshaws as cars aren't allowed to drive there but these people pushing carts are allowed to take you and your luggage to your hotel and I mean that people will sit on the carts sometimes and be pushed-crazy! And then there is the dodging of the motor bikes that love to honk the whole way through Pushkar just in case you may not know they are there and they drive too fast down these little alleys that about are 6 people wide sometimes a little more narrow and sometimes less narrow.
I really was in love with getting up and walking down to the lake surrounded by the blue and white buildings, where everyone bathes on the ghats as it's a holy lake, taking in everything, seeing the sun rise, reading, writing for hours, having chai on the roof top of my guesthouse-called the chill out cafe!
The last few days I was there was so great, I went for a hike to the top of the highest mountain there with a temple on top. The few was spectacular, watching the sun come up over the mountains, shining out and lighting up the green desert below, breath taking. The hike up was great, love the sweat and exercise, but the way down from the temple was the greatest because all the locals and tourist Indians were coming up and ALL wanted their photos taken. HOW BRILLIANT!
If you have never been to Rajastan, the thing that is so different are the bright colors of the people, if not in florescent greens, then reds, or orange, purple, pink, anything as long as it screams BRIGHT ! I love it. It's so different from the rest of India and this all against a green back ground of desert. And they are so serious in the photos but before and after the photos they are laughing and joyous and they love to see their photos on the digital camera, what a gift to give them. Many have never seen a photo of themselves. I wish I had a separate camera to take photos of them as they look laughingly onto their faces in the little metal box with a screen that has their face in it!
But I caught one family, as they got all serious for the photo and pulled the camera away, stuck my tongue out at them and made a funny face, they laughed and I captured it! All teeth, bright eyed and happy! In their normal state with their family. Even though someone did point out they don't laugh as much in Pushkar, but I think that is only in the main bazaar area as every where else I saw them and heard them laughing.
The other amazing thing that happened coming down off the hill, besides having chai with a group of men at the bottom, visualize this, a little stall, covered by black plastic on the top, a man fixing chai in is pot, the milk steaming, bubbling, almost over, pouring in the seasonings, water, and 12 men sitting on stools, benches, rocks and squatting all under a tree in the shade, all in conversation with each other, all in white pants and long white tops and some even with nicely pressed hat-now mind you everything is ironed neatly and kept crisp on these men and all happy to have me join them.
And everytime I join a tea stall many others come around. I think I bring them business actually, they even serve others tea that came after me, as I think they like a tourist being there. It's kind of cool and since I'm not in a hurry it's great! Why rush a good thing!
Ok, back to the other great thing that happened that day, I came down off the hill and these men all wanted their photos and with me and then they told me to go into the temple and dance- I replied "notch" which is hindi for dance and they laughed and loved that I knew that word-though I haven't a clue if it's how it is spelled. I went in and the Universe really works in fabulous ways. The people in the temple were chanting a chant that was easy to pick up so I started chanting on the side, they invited me to be with them so I walked over and sat with them.
The woman next to me kept wanting me to dance. I finally motioned that if she danced I'd dance and she joined me for a bit dancing and playing. I kept it PG-13. Then once I was into it she sat down. I really got how conscious I was being in a temple and not to be too sexual with my moves but then I realized that so much energy and that includes sexual energy is in every move but it doesn't have to be overtly sexual but it's subtle energy flowing through every cell of my body and I just listened to it and let it take me, let go of any performance and they did not stop chanting until I got really slow and then they stopped. I was a drippy mess by then, sweat from my elbows, my knees, every where.
Then they wanted me to photograph them, me with them and then they got me to dance again and then they got up and danced with me as one man took photos of us. Well I put it out there I want to dance, have an audience and here it is yet another ashram/temple and I'm dancing before people and they were so grateful and happy to have me chant with them and dance for and with them! It truly made my day. I danced for 1- 1 1/2 hours it was great. I'd just said I wanted to dance that morning and I got it. I finally bowed in nameste and excused myself to go shower and change clothes at my hotel.
I think I've performed more on this trip then in my life and I'm more and more excited about this. As it means I'm open to this. It's like that quote from Osho-which I may have said before but I love "if you are born a dancer and are a book keeper and dancing work can't come to you as you are at the book keeping address and it bounces back". I love that.
So I left my cherished Pushkar with friends and now we are up in Rishekesh, another favorite place of mine! I'm ecstatic to be in the mountains, fresh air, only motor bikes again, no cars, yes!!!! Everything is green and lush, the Gange-holy river, is very wide and running quickly, they ask you not to go too far in as I guess one person drown last year. Now they have chains to hold on to so you bathe and not worry about going down the river. And everyone bathes in the Gange!
This place is a holy place, filled with nature, peaceful energy and has the spirit of God or creation or both and then some. My heart is calm, my body and mind is happy to be here. I wake up and go for a walk at 6am, before sunrise, or sit on the river and meditate and chant as the sun comes up over the green treed mountains. Listening to nature of other people chanting or to the music up stream. Have a chai on the side of the street from a tiny stall that wakes you up gently and lovingly with the taste of masala spice and sugar.
Of course then there is my favorite drink from the last time I was here. I'm so happy it's still here. They squeeze lemon into a glass, then they take a sweet water with a little bit of bubbles, tap the top of the bottle with a steele utensil which pops something inside the glass-a rubber ball or something, it fizzes, he pours it into the glass of lemon, puts some spices in it, pours it from glass to glass to mix it and voula, it's a refreshing drink that cools and soothes your body and belly-even with or without ice. I don't want to know where the ice comes from as most drink the gange water but so far my belly is fine!
The funny thing about this town is the that the cows are extra small, well except one, they aren't normal size. the people file down their horns so they can't stab people like one cow tried to do the last time I was here but we all learned to avoid him. The cows have become more aggressive with wanting to be fed too. I watched several people buy bananas and they had to peel them very quickly to give the peel to the cow before the cow got the whole banana. I was chased by a cow last night that wanted my grapefruit, finally I got away and into an area he wasn't allow to go. Never had a cow chase me for fruit before.
So it's peaceful here, I'm finding yoga classes-as this is yoga central for India. I'm loving the altitude and freshness of the area. It's supporting me to look in. What keeps coming up on this trip for me over and over is: "what is friendship? What it is to you? Who are you as a friend? What are your qualities as a friend? What do you most want/need from a friendship? What do you give as a friend? What does friendship mean to you/me?" So many questions as I watch people interact with one another. Feeling like a foriegner even to those from my own country. The feeling of separateness I feel sometimes and then bamm something happens and I feel included. It's all in my mind if I feel included or not, how about you? When do you feel included? What do you think and feel friendship is?
For me it's huge, not quite gotten it down to something I can explain simply. I'm still learning what it is really, are you too? I know a friend listens, someone who loves to laugh, loves to share, accepts the other, someone who is touchable-I have to be able to touch someone to be their friend, something I've know for years, someone who will call me on my stuff, yet will hold each other when there are tears, authentic, truthful, up front, honest, compassionate and available for the other even if it's a 2 minute phone call just to say "Hey I'm thinking of you". I love that. Yet I know it's bigger then all of that, it's giving, recieving and being in silence together with comfort and being able to go do your own thing and be supported in it.
It's funny I know in one of my last emails I wrote about the pigeons that are looking outside themselves to get what they need-my interpretation anyway, but I also get that as humans we really are social beings, people they need touch and contact to live a full life. So there is a need of others, it's just when it gets to be an unhealthy need of "I can't be me without you, or I need you so I can do this or that or be that way". Yes it's great to do things with others but to always not do or be a certain way as the other person isn't there I think there an unhealthiness to it. We humans are funny creatures, analyzing everything instead of just being. Our minds-do you think birds think of all these things, nope, they are too busy being.
So I'm here at my old favorite restaurants, staying in my favorite ashram on the river, taking yoga, and relaxing, reading and writing before getting ready to leave India in a few short weeks-scares the crap out of me as I love this place. This is the hardest place for me to leave. I know I've lived here in many past lives and as hard as it is sometimes I get it.
Ok loves, I am off. I'd love to hear from you. I've love to hear your definition of friendship and what you think your greatest quality is as a friend and what you value in a friend? I send you great big hugs and so much love. Remember joy comes from within, so in each moment we are joyful, we just need to look inside within us to bring it out and share it with the world. Much love to you, Heather
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